Free Rocky Mountain Mayhem by Joan Rylen Page B

in.
    “Cheers!”
    Clink.
    “So how are you handling single mom-dom?”
Kate asked.
    Vivian picked up her glass and took a long
drink. “It’s not been easy. I’ve tried to make everything as
seamless as possible for the kids, but it’s so hard. Working full
time, keeping Audrey and Lauren in dance classes, and my god, the
laundry. It’s never-ending. And now…” Her voice broke.
    They all were quiet. Wendy got out a packet
of tissues and gave Vivian one.
    “With them married, she shows up to
everything. It feels so forced. She never looks like she’s having a
good time. Or even cares about the kids. It’s like it’s all for
show.”
    “I just don’t see why he decided to marry
her,” Lucy said. “Do you think it was to save face? Like, to say to
the world, ‘Yes, I left my wife and four kids, but look, I married
the other woman so I did it for a good reason?’ ”
    Vivian took another tissue. “I don’t know. He
keeps making bad decision after bad decision. Every time I talk to
him he sounds about ready to jump off a bridge.”
    “Let’s hope if he does he makes it look like
an accident so you can collect the insurance,” Wendy said, half
joking.
    Kate reached for the bottle and refilled
Vivian’s glass, emptying the wine bottle. “He is officially the
world’s biggest cow turd.”
    “First-class douche bag,” Wendy added.
    “A dipshit of mega magnitude,” Lucy said.
    “Y’all are making me feel better,” Vivian
said, cracking a smile.
    Wendy ordered a second bottle of wine that
arrived with their dinner. Kate made Vivian a plate that had mostly
salad but also some of everything.
    “Expand your horizons, Viv.”
    Vivian did and, once finished, offered an
opinion. “Not bad. The elk loin is pretty good, but the wild boar
ribs don’t taste like any pig I’ve ever had. The rabbit-rattlesnake
sausage just tastes like sausage. That I can handle.”
    “You’re crackin’ me up,” Lucy said. “You and
your critique.”
    “I’m forced to watch Food Network while I get
my pedicure.”
    The waitress cleared the table and came back
with a dessert tray. “Can I interest you in a dessert tonight?” She
went through her spiel, and the girls decided on the molten lava
cake with drunken berries and a banana pudding.
    Lucy poured the remainder of the wine into
each of their glasses.
    “Oh my god, is that George Clooney over
there?” Kate asked.
    “No…is it?” Vivian craned her neck.
    “It does kinda look like him from the side,”
Wendy said.
    Lucy picked up both of the wine bottles and
stuck the openings to her eyes.* “Where? Where’s George? I don’t
see him.”
    “Oh god, she’s doin’ the wine goggles,”
Vivian said. “What’s next?”
    “If you could meet any celebrity, who would
it be?” Lucy asked, setting down the bottles. “Mine would be
Beyoncé.” She did the “Single Ladies” hand wave.
    “You’re not single,” Vivian pointed out.
    Lucy shrugged and resumed seeing the world
through her wine goggles.
    “It’s a good song and good choice,” Kate
said. “But I’d love to meet Ron Paul. He’s the only one playing for
a different team.”
    Vivian slapped the table. “Matthew
McConaughey. He’s sexy.”
    “Yes, but he’s married now,” Kate pointed
out.
    “The question was meet, not marry.”
    “I love the way Matthew talks, he has the
best drawl.” Wendy took a sip of wine before continuing. “I’d love
to meet Ellen DeGeneres. I watch her show every day and she cracks
me up.”
    “She does a lot of good for a lot of people,”
Vivian said. “I like that about her and I’d like to meet her,
too.”
    The waitress placed the lava cake and banana
pudding in the center of the table, then added four forks and
spoons next to them.
    Lucy tilted her wine goggles up to the
waitress. “Is that George Clooney over there?”
    The waitress laughed and said, “No, but it
does look a lot like him.”
    “Damn, he’s hot. I was ready to get looney
for