Free Gypsy Jane - I've Been Shot Four Times and Served Three Prison Terms?This is the Incredible Story of by Jane Lee Page B

They had just done a runner out the back door. I wasn’t amused. I went in that shop and smashed the place to pieces. I was fuming because I hadn’t thought they were total cowards and would do a runner like that. After hiding my guns back in the usual place, I returned home.
    When Matt got home, I said, ‘I’m going to have to do the Essex mob. It’s been a week and I still ain’t got my money and they definately ain’t getting away with it.’ I knew this business wasn’t going to end well and I had to tell him what was going to happen, out of respect. That put him in a bad mood straight away.
    ‘No, you’re not going to do anyone,’ he said. ‘You promised not to get into more trouble. I’ll sort them out.’ I agreed. I owed him that much.
    Matt went out that night with a mate and a few hours later he came back with my money. I was over the moon. I thought I’d end up having to do someone but now it was done thanks to him. But at the same time, I knew that being a kept woman didn’t work for me. Matt wanted to be with me all the time. The problem was that I found it hard to change overnight, just like that. The more Matt was trying to rein me in, the less I liked it. I could have coped with the love and care he gave me but it was the control I couldn’t handle. I had gone from being my own person to him owning me and it wasn’t long before things started to change for the worse.
    Matt got so controlling that it was unbearable. He stopped all my friends coming over. He didn’t like any of them and he kept telling me they weren’t my friends and that they didn’t really like me. They were just using me, he would say. I was cracking up mentally over it. I wasn’t allowed out. I wasn’t allowed to have visitors and I felt like he was psychologically destroying me. All he did was put me down. The clothes I wore weren’t right, the way I had my hair wasn’t right and he said everything and anything he could think of was wrong with me. He did it in such a nice and loving way that I felt he was right. A part of me believed him but the other part of me was fighting it all the way. I really did try to be everything he wanted me to be. He said that hewanted to buy a house in the middle of the forest for me, him and John so that nobody could come near us. Oh, how I tried to be his everything but, in my heart, I knew it wouldn’t work. I wanted so badly to stop being a criminal and be the woman Matt wanted but I couldn’t. And what’s more, I wouldn’t. I wouldn’t be his prisoner at any price. My heart was breaking.
    I worried about my independence and how I would cope if it all ended tomorrow with Matt. So, while I didn’t take up the beer run again, I was still doing little deals on puff and Billy without him knowing about it. It wasn’t easy. As part of the way he was controlling me, he had said I was too good to do housework and had got one of his mates to do it. This was just his way of keeping an eye on me. I started to resent it because I felt like he was checking up on me in my own home. I went from doing everything for myself to doing nothing apart from a few deals when Matt was out of the house.
    He would say, ‘All I want you to do is sit there, look gorgeous and do your nails.’ But there was more to life than that. And there was more to me. I kept on with my own bits of business, not least because I knew that one day I would return to my old life and would need something to fall back on.
    Inevitably, one day he came home early while I was just about to do a little deal. I had to wait for him to fall asleep in the afternoon and then I was off out the door. All the way back I prayed he hadn’t woken up. I crept back in but it was too late – he was already out lookingfor me. I was going to get into bother again when he got back. I had to think fast. When he returned, I told him I’d been at a car-boot fair. I even had some shopping to make it look good but he wasn’t stupid. He knew what