Free Sorority Girls With Guns by Cat Caruthers

such an ass he wants to make me figure it out myself. You have to help me figure out what it is!"
    I groan but keep my eyes closed. "Is it your goal to make sure I get as little sleep on vacation as you usually get during finals?"
    Morgan heaves a sigh. "I'm sorry, but this is a serious problem. And if you help me solve it, then I can leave you alone and you can sleep in your tanless cave all day."
    "Okay, but I think better with my eyes closed." I turn over our lunchtime conversation in my head. "You're right, I think there is probably a moneyless solution here."
    "The worst part is, I think he's right about Biff getting away with this," Morgan says, and I can almost hear her snarling. "I really, really hate to think that he'd get a monetary reward for screwing me over, and carte blanche to do it again to someone else."
      I'm still thinking about another part of the conversation. "You know, we should focus on what else people - rich or not - do when they don't want to cave to a blackmailer," I say. "Matt's right - even rich people will eventually decide paying out isn't the answer in a situation like this. So what else do they do?"
    "Steal the video back?" Morgan sighs. "That was probably easier years ago when they kept video on - what did they call those rectangular black things we used to watch movies on when we were really little?"
    "Video tapes." I give up and open my eyes. "And I don't think that's it, either. Anyone who has anything they consider valuable will keep it safe. No, I think there's another avenue." I stare out at the ocean, which we can't swim in right now because of pollution or germs or who knows what.
    "What do you mean?"
    I think about Biff and his pissy attitude toward the less-financially-well-endowed. Are all rich people like that? Would Matt or Charlie say something like that in a similar situation? What if Tiffany or Morgan had a sex tape of a slumming-it boyfriend?
    "Even the playing field," I say, watching the water lap at the shore, spitting up empty beer bottles and used condoms. I can't see how the water would be any cleaner tomorrow or the day after. "Some people, both rich and poor, keep a running list of things they can use against basically everyone they know. I'm guessing you don't do that, or you'd already have something on Biff. And now that he knows you hate him, it'll be harder for you to get anything on him - but certainly not impossible."
    "You think I should get a sex tape of him?" Morgan's green eyes are flashing in the sunlight. "You know you can see my face in that tape but you can't see his?"
    "So he must have intentionally moved the camera to get a good and embarrassing shot of you," I say. "I guess you were, well, distracted and didn't notice."
    "Yeah." She folds her arms over her Guess bikini top.  "What if we got a video that showed him  - not just having sex, but having sex with some really embarrassing woman?"
    I sit up. "Like, someone really ugly?"
    She nods. "That too, but also really poor. You heard how he talked to me, thinking I was..." She lowers her voice dramatically. "Financially disabled."
    "You're right!" Morgan really is smart enough to go to medical school. "Poor wouldn't be so embarrassing if she was really hot. But poor and ugly would just make him look...desperate."
    "Like the truck doesn't?" Morgan giggles.
    "Why did you have sex with that loser anyway?"
    She stops laughing. "I regret that. You know, I really don't get drunk that often - not like you and everyone else at our house parties. Usually I stay upstairs and study, because I want to keep my grades up."
    "So you and Richard really are up there studying?" I stare at Morgan. She's not quite as bad a liar as Tiffany, but I am extremely good at filtering lies from truth. It's a side effect of being lied to multiple times per hour. Morgan is staring down at her lap, biting her lower lip, toes digging into the sand.
    "I know nobody believes me, but yes." She sighs. "We're just friends, and we have a