Free Bellona (Part 1.5 of The Saskia Trilogy) by Aoife Marie Sheridan Page B

you,” I whisper, my heart beating rapidly until I think I might be sick. His grip tightens on my hands. “I am with child.” I decide to give him the nice news first. He seems frozen and I look up to see his eyes wide and sparkling with tears of joy.
    “I am going to be a father?” he asks in disbelief and I can’t take this moment away from him, my fear flees and I let his joy fill me also.
    “Yes.” Tears of relief spring to my eyes and he laughs while pulling me into an embrace.
    “We are going to have a baby.” He sounds so shocked but I laugh through my tears.
    “Yes we are, a boy.”
    “How do you know?” he asks, leaning back. And I curse myself.
    “Miriam. I bumped into him and he told me.”
    Nierra huffs but it is in good humor. “I talk to him a lot and he never told me you were pregnant. I can’t believe this. I am going to be a father.” I have never seen him so happy and a part of me feels angry that it takes a baby to make him smile like that, but I push it aside, wanting to enjoy every second.
    “I can’t believe it either.” I wipe my tears.
    Nierra lays his large hand on my abdominal, his eyes full of wonder and then he looks at me. “I love you, Bellona, and I thank God for allowing me to have you.” His kiss is gentle and soft but I deepen it, I never can have enough of Nierra but he stops while smiling. “You need to relax and mind our little baby.” He rubs my stomach now, the look of contentment and happiness on his face is so rewarding that I lie back and let him fuss over me. As I lie there I think of Miriam’s words again, and my stomach tightens. Fear stabs at my heart and I find my mouth opening, I want to clamp my hand over it in fear of saying it, yet all of a sudden I need to tell him.
    “I have killed people,” I blurt it out and then sit frozen as Nierra seems to sit straighter. I can hear my heart racing, my blood pounds and I have an overwhelming feeling to run.
    “In self-defense?” Nierra speaks quietly, but it penetrates through my haze of fear and I try to calm myself for the baby’s sake, but I don’t look at him as I speak.
    “No, not in self-defense.” More silence follows and I still don’t dare look at him.
    “When?” he doesn’t sound like himself, he sounds like a stranger.
    “A few months ago was the last time.” He seems to choke and I look at him for the first time and wish I hadn’t. His face is red his eyes ablaze with anger, disbelief and pain.
    “Last time?” he questions, while shaking his head before he stands. “How many?” I look away again as tears roll down my face, I shouldn’t have said anything. I shouldn’t have listened to Miriam. Nierra leans over the couch that I sit on. “How many?” he roars, making me close my eyes.
    “Six, Nierra.” He seems too stumble away from me, his hands clenched as his mind tries to process what I have just told him. I don’t dare move but a part of me is relieved that he is still here. Then he turns to me as if something has just occurred to him.
    “Are you even pregnant?” his question is filled with spite and I rise too, feeling angry.
    “How dare you?”
    He laughs at me, not with humor but bitterness and anger.
    “How dare I? You just told me you have killed people and you’re questioning me?”
    “I am telling you the truth about everything so that we have an honest relationship.” I try to stand a bit taller, hoping I will look authoritative, but inside my body shakes and Nierra can see through it.
    “Sit down and stop speaking.” I do so immediately, his rage has me afraid of him for the first time and I find myself glancing around me for a weapon.
    His bark of laughter makes me look at him. “What are you planning to hurt me?”
    I cover my face with shame; how he can see me so clearly. “I am afraid that you will hurt me and my baby!” I shout the truth and it calms his rage.
    He is still angry but he looks guilty. “I would never hurt you.” His words make me