Free Bed of Lies by Shelly Ellis Page A

honestly, I’m just happy that you’re breathing and you’re still here with us. We didn’t know if you were gonna make it. I’m happy that you’re alive!”
    â€œAt least you are,” Terrence muttered before taking a drink.
    Evan closed his eyes. “I hate seeing you this messed up. I hate seeing you this depressed. I know it’s hard, but—”
    â€œI’m not . . . fucking . . . depressed!” Terrence yelled, pulling back his arm and throwing his bottle at an adjacent wall. Glass exploded everywhere, making Evan jump from his seat, catching both men by surprise.
    â€œThen what the hell would you call that?” Evan asked seconds later, pointing at the oozing stain that was now on the living room wall and pooling on the Brazilian hardwood floor.
    â€œFrustration,” Terrence said through clenched teeth. “I’m frustrated at being stuck in this fucked-up body! I’m angry that even if I wanted to leave the house, I don’t want to deal with the looks of pity I see in people’s eyes whenever I go into town. You think I don’t know what they’re thinking, Ev? Oh, poor Terry Murdoch! He was such a big, handsome guy who had the world at his fingertips. Well, he doesn’t have it anymore, does he? He’s just a one-eyed cripple. That poor, poor boy! That loser ! ” He furiously shook his head. “I don’t need that shit. I don’t want people feeling sorry for me! You included, Ev.”
    â€œSo what? Are you just going to stay hiding in here forever? You’re just going to wait until you gain two hundred pounds from all that shit you eat now and die of a heart attack? Or is your plan to drink enough beer and tequila that you die of cirrhosis of the liver first?”
    â€œI haven’t decided yet,” Terrence said, as he reached for another half-empty bottle. “When I do, I’ll let you know.”
    Terrence watched as his brother loudly swallowed, like he was fighting back a myriad of emotions. Instead of seeing pity in Evan’s eyes, he saw a desolate sadness that almost made him regret what he had just said—almost.
    â€œFine,” Evan murmured as he walked back across the living room toward the front door. “Whenever the time comes, I’ll have someone come and pick up your body before it starts to stink and we get complaints from the neighbors.” He reached for the doorknob, then paused. “But just remember this, Terry. Whenever I was at my lowest point, whenever I felt like I’d be better off dead, you were always the one to give me a pep talk and set me straight. You were the one who gave me perspective about being with Leila and told me that none of what other people thought about us mattered. You’re the one who told me to pull it together and go after what I wanted or just stay fucking miserable. Now you’re at your lowest point and you won’t even listen to your own advice. You’d rather listen to the voices of people who feel sorry for you, but those people mean nothing to you! You’re listening to them instead of the people who really care!” He shook his head again in bemusement. “That doesn’t make you a loser, Terry. It makes you stupid and a fucking hypocrite!”
    He then opened the door and slammed it closed behind him. The sound of the television filled the empty room.
    Terrence lowered his head at his brother’s words.
    Yes, his body was broken. There was no getting around that truth. But did he finally have to admit that his spirit was broken too? Did he need help to heal it?
    â€œYou need something,” a little voice in his head said. “Because what you’re doing ain’t working, bruh! What you’re doing will have you dead in a year!”
    After a few minutes, Terrence reached for his cane again and slowly hoisted himself to his feet. He limped toward the coffee table, where his mail sat along