off the tips of my fingernails, reaching out like electricity, or an inchworm looking for footing. I ball my hands up into fists and pray that I’m the only one who noticed.
“What the hell happened in there?”
She’s speaking to me and the only answer I have is that I have no clue. But that’s only going to make her madder. So, I start to stammer out a stream of consciousness, speaking as I think.
“I don’t know. I mean, I do know. I lost control. Again. And it almost went totally sideways. Again. But the remnant? He wasn’t what he looked like. It looked like you brought a gentle, unassuming light remnant. Which is smart, ease us all in, right? Except, I mean, I couldn’t have been the only one who saw it? Right?” I’m gesturing frantically and looking from Noah to Daya and their mouths are slack so I just plow on forward. “The remnant changed. It was a hollow. Oh, shit. It was hollow! And it started taunting me. And I just … stood up. And I acted without thinking. What have I done?” I’m panicking now. “Is Tony ok? He’s gotta be ok…”
And I’m panting, and I think I’m crying, and I’m shaking. Daya stands without a word and waddles over to a table under a window. She pours a thick liquid from a crystal beaker into a small glass and ambles over to hand it to me. “Drink.” I meet her eyes, hesitant, but the darkness is gone and somehow I trust her.
My throat burns when I swallow the liquid and then I sigh. The panic subsides and I’m able to think in a straight line again. “Thank you,” I say, handing the glass back to her.
Daya sits on the edge of her desk and folds her arms into her ample lap. “Feel better?”
“Much.”
“Good. Now. You say the remnant was hollow?”
I nod. “That’s what it looked like. It’s eyes changed and it’s face, like melted and it’s mouth stretched with all these extra teeth. It started talking about those people I killed, like it wanted to upset me.” Whatever it was that she gave me has me so calm, I feel like I’m describing a simple math problem. “Daya? Will Tony be ok?”
“Yes, he will be fine. We’ll see to it.”
I relax even further. “Can remnants do that? Pretend to be something they’re not?”
“It’s rare. Very rare.” Daya and Noah exchange a look. “And that remnant was vetted by all the teachers, witches and ‘locks that are very powerful and knowledgeable enough for me to trust.
“What are you saying?”
“Zoe … I have to ask. Are you sure you saw what you said you did?”
I have not one single doubt about what I saw. But I don’t say that because my mouth just hangs open and whatever potion she gave me to drink is doing its job putting out all the little fires if anxiety and indignation. I nod. Slowly.
Daya turns to Noah. “I thought she was learning control. I thought she hadn’t had any more slips, that she’s been able to push away her dark magic.”
Noah looks lost and I answer before he does. “I’ve been playing with it in my room. Dark magic.” I know I’ve been mad at Noah, but that’s mostly because I know he has every right to be mad at me. He’s put his neck on the line more than once and I’m not going to let him get caught covering up for me. The look of shock he’s giving me right now is perfect. Sure he’s shocked because he knows I’m lying, but Daya won’t know that. She’s gonna think he’s shocked because of what I’ve admitted.
She gives him a scathing look. “How have you not known about this?”
I answer for him again. “I discovered the magic dampening spell on the window and thought there’s probably other spells on the room, too. You know, to alert him to what I’m doing. I did my own little anti-magic spell.”
Noah tries to speak but Daya holds up a finger. “For the sake of my sanity, please explain why you thought this was a good idea.”
“I can’t control my dark magic without understanding it. Does that make sense? I need to know the
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