Free Durarara!!, Vol. 3 (Novel) by Ryohgo Narita Page A

flesh and blood is in mortal peril. You see, I am testing you and thus acting out my own so-called peril…but if I might be perfectly honest, I am in all actuality truly in danger! Gosh, I don’t know how to say this… You’re my son. You understand, don’t you?”
    “Of course I get it,” Shinra said flatly. He strode over to Shingen, then pulled the wallet out of his helpless father’s coat and tossed it to Celty.
    “Wha—!” Shingen yelped, stunned. Celty pulled a pair of ten thousand–yen bills out and chucked the wallet back at Shingen. The shadowy restraints vanished, the black thorns dispersing cleanly into the apartment air.
    “Thanks for your business.”
    “…Ripped off to the tune of twenty thousand yen, how about that? And on top of that, I finally see my son’s true nature. Well, you’re not getting any inheritance.”
    “I don’t want any, and if I don’t mind saying so myself, this seems to be a quite fitting action for your own son to commit, don’t you think?” Shinra quipped.
    His father grumbled through the gas mask. “Rrrgh… Taken to the cleaners by a monster…”
    “If Celty took me to the cleaners and stole my soul, I’d be a happy man,” Shinra retorted.
    Celty sat back down shyly and unpaused the video game. But Shingen interrupted by sidling closer to her and noting, “Nicely done, Celty. I can’t believe how thoroughly you’ve tamed my son.”
    “It’s kind of gross to talk about ‘taming’ your own son like he’s a dog.”
    “Oops! And you’re positively brimming with morals and all that. It seems that you’ve lost your fangs and settled into Japanese customs. But I believe that, if you’re going to display proper respect, you ought to start by respecting the father of your landlord,” Shingen blathered on.
    “It’s not an issue of morals,”
Celty typed irritatedly.
“I’m saying you shouldn’t look down on Shinra.”
    “Oh?” Shingen exclaimed as he read both the message on the PDA and the body language she exhibited. “Why, Celty, are you saying…you’ve fallen in love with my Shinra? I knew that my son was odd, what with his unhealthy fetish for you. Does that mean the feeling is mutual?”
    Celty held back on typing further for the moment, unsure of how to respond to that extremely personal question. After a long silence, she looked at Shinra’s face and typed two simple words.
    “That’s right.”
    The man’s son reacted immediately. “Celty! I can’t believe you’re being so open and honest about our relationship! I’m so, so, so, so, so, so happy! A one-sided pining as lonely as the abalone in the cove has developed into a loving bond, rock hard and unshakable, worthy of being shouted from the rooftops to the ears of unconcerned strangers! I am leaping with exultation at your admission, my dear!”
    “Huh? Strangers? But I’m your father…”
    Shinra stood up and squirmed with joy, ignoring the grumbling from the gas mask. Celty felt rising embarrassment at her partner’s emotional display and extended a blanket of shadow that forced Shinra down into his seat.
    “Whaa—?! I think you’re beautiful even when you’re using your shadow more nimbly than your own limbs, Celty.”
    “Just shut up. Don’t shout that embarrassing nonsense at the top of your lungs! Also, that simile you used earlier was terrible and made no sense.”
    “Why, that just shows you the confusion that ensued at my utter joy to learn of the trueness of your love! And amidst that chaos and confusion, the only certain thing is my devotion to…
mrrgh
…
mrff!
”
    He squirmed as she covered his mouth to stop him from talking. Meanwhile, Shingen sat at the table and imperiously inserted himself into the conversation.
    “Hmm… Just a moment. Do you really think I’ll allow this kind of relationship?”
    “Excuse me?”
    “I hate to bring this up, but in human society, you are an unwanted guest—a monster, if you will. Are you aware of that?” he