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out.”
I clicked the light switch and headed to bed. As Miss A left my door and continued her rounds, I wondered if I should’ve talked to her about my problems. All the girls on my floor were crazy about Miss A. Hana was a particular fan. She told me I ought to spend more time with Miss A, but frankly my heart just wasn’t in it. I just missed Ms W. too much.
My window was open a little to let the breeze in. It was a cool spring night, like so many at Bard. The fog and wind on the island made even May cold, and it was only mid-April. I lay down on my bed, hoping to try to think things through, but I fell asleep before I could get very far. Sometimes I had weird dreams at Bard, but that night, I had a blank, restless sleep. I woke feeling tired and a little hopeless like I’d spent the night running away from faceless shadows in a nightmare I couldn’t quite remember. I pulled on my uniform and went to the cafeteria looking for a friendly face.
Heathcliff sometimes waited for me at breakfast but today he was notably absent. I couldn’t decide if I was disappointed—or relieved. When I saw Blade and Samir at a table in the corner, I grabbed a muffin and a carton of milk from the breakfast line and headed their way.
“Miranda!” Samir said, relief in his voice. “You’re alive!”
“When we didn’t see you at dinner, we got worried,” Blade said. “But when they didn’t send out the hounds, we assumed you hadn’t gone AWOL.”
That’s what happened when you broke curfew or went missing from your dorm. They literally sent out hound dogs to find you.
“I didn’t feel like dinner,” I said. “Sorry to worry you guys.”
“I told you she’d be fine,” Samir said, sounding triumphant.
“You only said that because you didn’t want to go out in the dark to look for her,” Blade said, her mouth half-full. “Gotta watch out for this one, Miranda. He does not have your back.”
“I do so,” Samir said. “As long as I can watch her back in daylight or a very well lit area.”
I couldn’t help but smile.
“See? She forgives me,” Samir said, as if that was his trump card.
“So why did you ditch us for dinner?” Blade asked, chewing a bit of oatmeal and then swallowing.
“How can you eat that?” Samir asked Blade, watching her down the gruel-like oatmeal.
“Mind over matter,” Blade said. “So? What gives?” She looked at me again.
“I was just tired,” I said. “Maybe I’m coming down with something.”
“Well you look like crap,” Blade agreed.
“Hey, thanks,” I said sarcastically, but I didn’t mind. There was something warm and familiar about their good-natured insulting.
“I told them all you were probably with Heathcliff and he’s like a big bad ass, so you would be okay,” Samir said.
“Yeah,” I agreed weakly. There was no doubt that the version of Heathcliff I met last night near my dorm was pretty scary. It’s just I wasn’t used to him scaring me . But I didn’t want to tell Blade or Samir about that.
“Did Heathcliff ever find Catherine?” Blade asked me.
“I don’t know.”
“Don’t know what?” This was Hana, she’d come up behind me and put down her tray. “Miranda, good to see you among the living.”
“I’m fine – really,” I said.
“We almost broke curfew to look for you,” Hana said.
“We told her already,” Samir said. Tentatively, he shoveled a tiny bite of oatmeal in his mouth and made a face of disgust as he tasted it.
“And by we I meant Blade and me,” Hana said. “Samir offered to stay at the dorm in case you came back.”
“I’m a coward and I am not afraid to admit it,” Samir said.
“So who were you guys talking about?” Hana asked.
“I asked Miranda if Heathcliff found Catherine.”
“Oh. Did he?”
“Miranda doesn’t know.”
Now was about the time Hana would jump in with a hundred questions, but instead she just said, “oh,” in a distracted kind of way. She sounded