Free The Revenge of Dr Von Burpinburger by John Heffernan Page B

morning sun, surrounded by pigeons.
    â€˜They’ve been telling me all sorts of things,’ he said when Eric appeared. ‘Jenny here has a bad case of wing wobble. Mary says her feathers are falling out, and Luke (he’s the big one over there)has been bragging about how good he is at pooping on people’s heads.’

    Then Einstein stood and grinned at Eric. ‘Hey, watch this!’
    He clapped his paws and gave a shrill whistle. The large pigeon called Luke flew up into the air, then swooped down and landed next to Einstein. The mouse climbed onto his back and the bird took off again, flying straight up into the sky.
    â€˜Yahoo!’ Einstein yelled from high above the apartment. ‘How wicked is that?’
    â€˜Be careful,’ Eric called. He’d already lost a cat when it leapt over the balcony after some pigeons. It fell twenty-three floors onto a taxi. He sure didn’t want to lose this little guy.

    â€˜Look at me,’ Einstein shouted, waving his arms in the air. ‘No hands!’ Eric covered his eyes.
    After a spiral dive, the pigeon landed. Einstein jumped off and did a little dance.
    â€˜Fab and fiercesome, eh?’ he laughed, holding up his paw for a high five. ‘Totally wild and wowsome!’
    â€˜Daft and dangerous too,’ Eric added.
    â€˜Nah! Piece of cheese, pal. And once I’ve got all the gear –’
    â€˜All the what?’
    â€˜Flying gear. I can’t be a pilot without flying gear. Helmet, goggles, gloves, a good pair of boots. I’ll be set then.’ Einstein pointed to the sky and howled, ‘I want to fly to the moon and back.’
    Eric rolled his eyes. ‘I want some breakfast.’

    Later that afternoon, Dr von Burpinburger rubbed his hands together. ‘I’m soooo brilliant.’
    â€˜Are you sure?’ Tikazza Brique asked. Beads of sweat had formed on his brow, and his hands were shaking uncontrollably.
    â€˜Of course I’m sure I’m brilliant!’
    â€˜No, I mean – are you sure this will work, Master?’
    â€˜Of course it will work,’ the doctor huffed as he strapped his assistant into the catapult and began tightening the thick rubber strap that would send Tikazza Brique hurtling through the air to Eric’s apartment. ‘I am an expert in maths and physics, and I’ve done all the calculations. You will land exactly in the middle of their rooftop terrace.’
    â€˜Don’t you mean crash , Master?’ the assistant groaned.
    â€˜Oh, stop being such a wimp, Brique,’ the doctor growled. ‘Think of the glory.’
    â€˜The what, Master?’
    â€˜The glory! You will have done your bit to capture our little Einstein!’
    â€˜But Master, something feels dreadfully wrong about all this.’
    â€˜What on earth could feel wrong?’
    â€˜Me, Master. I feel wrong. I’m … terrified!’
    â€˜Terrified? Of what?’
    â€˜Heights, Master. I hate heights .’ His whole body shook with fear.
    â€˜Bah!’ Dr von Burpinburger scoffed. ‘All in the mind, Brique.’ He tapped his head. ‘All in the mind.’
    â€˜Please, Master,’ Brique begged. ‘I’m too young to die!’
    â€˜Don’t talk nonsense.’ The doctor frowned as he grasped the scissors. ‘You’ll give them the fright of their lives. They won’t know what hit them.’
    â€˜But Master –’
    Before Brique could say another word, Dr von Burpinburger cut the rope.

COO-RAZY! COO-RACKERS!
    Einstein heard the scream and ran to the window. Eric joined him just in time to see a large man flying from the top of the building on the other side of the street.
    â€˜Oh no,’ Eric cried. ‘It’s them!’ He gaped at the human missile. Brique was spinning head over heels through the air, thrashing his arms and kicking his legs, and screaming for help. ‘He’s