They’d always gotten it.
By the time the workday ended, she’d managed to throw together a couple of ideas, which she e-mailed to Shane’s inbox. Her eyes burned and her neck ached. Four hours of sleep had been better than none, but she was still fatigued to the point of dropping. She wished for the time and energy to go for a run.
After picking up the baby and stopping by the supermarket for diapers, formula and a few groceries, she realized her running days might be over. She couldn’t run and leave Alex alone in the apartment—even if she had the energy.
As she trudged up the stairs, baby in one arm, plastic grocery sacks dangling from her elbow and diaper bag and purse over the opposite shoulder, reality struck. Being a good mother was the hardest, most unselfish job on the planet.
And she had a lot of adjustments to make.
“You’re worth it, though, my lamb,” she said to the boy balanced between the crook of her elbow and her hip. She was determined to read and study and do everything in her power to become the best possible mother to this child who held her heart. No matter how much he cried, no matter how much sleep she lost, there were those special moments when he smiled or laughed and cooed up at her with recognition andpleasure. Then her heart filled with profound joy and the belief that together they would be a family. Somehow. If she could get it right and keep her job in the process. She owed that much to him and to Janna.
“Aunt Cassidy will do better, sweetie, I promise.” She shifted him higher, balancing while she fumbled with the key.
An amused voice jolted her. “Talking to yourself?”
Cassidy jumped and dropped the keys.
Arms and ankles crossed, Nic Carano leaned against the railing outside her door. He wore a crisp, maize-colored shirt unbuttoned over a navy blue T-shirt that said, “Certified Hokey Pokey Instructor.”
Cassidy ignored the sudden butterflies in her stomach. Nic looked as neat and fresh as a catalog model. She felt like the bottom of a clothes hamper.
“You scared me.”
With a charming grin and easy grace, he retrieved the keys and unlocked the door.
As she stumbled awkwardly past, lugging too much stuff, Nic snatched the baby, swinging him high overhead. “Hey, Alex. How’s my man?”
Alex gurgled happily, toothless mouth wide open. The sight was precious, endearing, and Cassidy’s heart turned over with profound love for her sister’s child.
“Be careful,” she said. “He’ll spit up in your face.”
Nic’s shoulders bunched. He grimaced and slowly returned Alex to a level position. “Was that the voice of experience?”
“Unfortunately.” Cassidy dipped her head in wry concession and dropped the load of bags in the doorway. Her place was a mess. Baby toys scattered here and there. Unfolded laundry piled on the table. This morning’s coffee cup and Alex’s dirty bottles cluttered the sink. Until last week, she’d been a perfectionist here as well as at work. Anyone with off-white furniture had better be neat. Today she was too tired to care. “Sorry the place is a disaster.”
“It is?” Nic’s honest bewilderment made her laugh.
“Does that mean your apartment is less than tidy?”
“Room. I don’t have an apartment. My mom says I’m a pig, a throwback to Great-Uncle Dominic.” Still holding Alex, he plopped down on the sofa in the same spot he’d occupied last night. Alex grabbed Nic’s bottom lip and pulled.
“You still live with your parents?” Hadn’t she figured him for the type?
“For now.” Nic extracted his lip from Alex’s grasp and handed the baby a rattle. “I’m looking around. Time to get out on my own.”
No kidding. She shuddered at the very thought of still living in Grandmother’s house.
But then, the Carano family wasn’t anything like her grandmother.
“The apartment directly below this one is open.” As soon as she spoke the words, Cassidy wished them back. What was she thinking? She