Free Sealed with a Diss by Lisi Harrison Page B

frozen in disbelief.
    “Just separate out the bread, grease, dairy, and meat or fish parts, and toss the rest in the compost,” he said with the kind of joy one usually reserves for announcing puppy births. “If I hear a single word from any of you, you’ll all be back here tomorrow. And I hear the lunch special is Mexican fish stew.” He slid a metal folding chair against the kitchen door to prop it open, but it immediately slammed shut, sending the chair careening across the Café like a stone from a slingshot. The girls burst out laughing.
    “Begin!” Mr. Myner slid another chair in front of the door and this time sat down to hold it in place. “Not another sound.” He pulled a small black notebook from the back pocket of his moss-green cords and began jotting down his thoughts with a red mini-golf pencil.
    As Massie tossed a fish spine in the trash, her anger toward Mr. Myner quadrupled. Not so much because she was sorting cafeteria trash after school—she’d known the risk they were taking by skipping class—but because Mr. Myner had caught them before she’d had a chance to recap after ESP. And the need to discuss was eating away at her like worms in a compost.

T HE B LOCK E STATE
D RIVEWAY
    Monday, April 19th
    4:35 P.M.
    “Finally!” Massie stepped onto her gravel driveway, slammed the door of the silver Range Rover, and wave-thanked her driver, Isaac, for the ride. The instant he drove off, she let out a major sigh of relief. “I officially lift the ban on all OL topics and declare them OL.”
    “Huh?” Claire crinkled her blond brows in confusion.
    “All
off
-limit car discussion topics like ESP, compost detention, and the bomb shelter are now
on
-limit discussion topics because Isaac is gone,” Alicia explained, trying to wave away the rotten-trash smell that had glommed onto them like LBRs at a school dance. “Ew. I need a loofah.”
    “I need shampoo.” Dylan pulled an eggshell out of her matted red hair and booger-flicked it onto the ground.
    “I need a skin graft.” Kristen examined her mud-stained hands.
    “Well, what are we waiting for, ladies?” Massie linked elbows with Alicia and Dylan. Dylan linked with Kristen. And Kristen linked with Claire. “To the spa!”
    Like a human Frank Gehry torque-chain bracelet, they marched across the perfectly manicured lawn of the Block estate, toward the rustic horse-shed-turned-sanctuary. Along the way, Massie organized her thoughts into discussion topics, so they could get down to business the instant they got inside.
     
    1)Force Kristen to choose a date (Griffin?).
    2)Force Alicia to choose a date (Josh?).
    3)Force Dylan to choose a date (Kemp vs. Plovert).
    4)Help Claire get over the re-gifting thing so she can ask Cam.
    5)Discuss: What could Derrington’s issue with me possibly be? Is he intimidated? Does he feel like he’s not good enough? Am I too perfect? Is it alpha to ask him to the party anyway, or should I find a new date? WWSD? (What Would Skye Do?)
    6)Ways to make Chris Abeley get over ex, Fawn. Example: Spread vicious rumor about her unbreakable bed-wetting habit.
    7)Ways to make Chris Abeley like Skye. Example: Give her a crash course in horseback riding.
    8)Ways to make Chris Abeley
call
Skye. Example: Break into his cell phone and change all his stored numbers to Skye’s.
    9)Ask Alicia if there was a Hard Candy Galaxy Glitter eyeliner pencil in the bomb shelter. If not, buy one before the party.
    10) Has anyone even
thought
about studying for finals yet?
     
    The closer they got to the horse shed, the more Massie’s heart pounded with excitement. She needed some unobstructed alone time with her girls almost as much as she needed a Dead Sea–salt scrub. Fortunately, she was minutes away from both.
    “Clll-aire!” a distant girl’s voice shouted.
    The Pretty Committee stopped at once.
    “Clll-aire!” they heard again.
    Everyone turned left, toward the quaint stone guesthouse where Claire’s family had been living for