Free Headstrong Quarterback: A New Adult Sports Romance by Ava Catori Page B

head spun with panic. My chest was tight. He was hurt. The announcers analyzed the play. I watched in fear as they carted him off the field. He signaled to the crowd with a thumbs up. The crowd cheered wildly. I heard nothing. Everything moved in slow motion.
    I jerked from my seat and ran in search of my lover. I knew he wasn’t okay. I sensed it. My face went numb. I couldn’t feel my lips. I knew he had to be shredded with pain. The hit, the ferocity of it… No. Don’t pay head games with yourself. Just get to him.
    There was no question. His season was over. He’d be side-lined. The fracture meant that his career was on hold. I knew it was a bad one. I saw him roll up over his leg, bending it way too far. Every single time he went down, my eyes were glued to him, just making sure he gets back up. This time he didn’t.
    It replayed over and over in my head. The pain on his face, the people surrounding him, my view blocked, waiting…waiting to see.
    I tore through the building, got to the locker room, but it didn’t matter. I was left in a holding pattern, forced to wait outside. Once I got the news, I could breathe. It pained me that his season was on hold. I knew how much it meant to him, but at least it wasn’t worse. His spine – his neck, he could have been paralyzed.
    He was everything to me. I couldn’t lose him, not now, not ever. He was my entire world.
    Nothing prepared us for the mood swings that would follow his injury. Steel took the news hard, and I couldn’t make it better. I couldn’t save him .
    On top of his injury, there was still a giant elephant in the room. The bone of contention was Phil’s. I still worked as a bartender at a seedy dive. I promised to mail out some resumes, email some, and whatever else it took to find something different. I’d visit job sites like Dice, Indeed, Monster and any other place I could think of. I’d stalk LinkedIn. I had no idea what I wanted to do, but if it bothered him that much, it was the least I could do. He was already pissed off most of the time while in recovery. Maybe he’d get off my back and focus on his healing, rather than my crappy career.
    The lack of response didn’t help my self-confidence. I went over my details again and again, rewording things, and tried to decide if I was even good enough for some of the positions I’d applied for. Who was I fooling?
    Our relationship was getting rocky. We weren’t in a good place. He was ferocious, like a wild grizzly bear on a mission to piss off everyone in his path. I was spiraling into a deep depression. Our fights became pointless, they were stupid and way too often.
    “You can’t work at that shitty place forever,” he’d grunt.
    “I’m trying,” I shot back. It was like beating a dead horse. He wouldn’t let the topic drop. “It’s not like I didn’t put my resume out there, but nobody’s calling.”
    “That’s no excuse. Find more places to apply then. You need take charge and push harder,” he yelled.
    “Listen, I mean this in the gentlest way possible, but back the fuck off. Stop pressuring me. I’m doing what I can.” I glared at him.
    Steel rolled his eyes upward, but it caught me the wrong way that day.
    “You’re fucking impossible,” I fumed.
    “Stop being a god damn freeloader and do something about it.”
    Holy shit. When he said that, I flipped. “Freeloader? Are you serious? Fuck you. Just fuck you. You dragged my ass here and begged me to stay. I didn’t ask you to take me in. I was happy where I was, before you felt the need to change my life.”
    “Happy where you were? Are you kidding me? You were cowering like a wounded, beaten-down dog and lived in a room with a mattress and a lightbulb. You shared a bathroom with drunks and drug addicts. What the fuck are you complaining about? If it weren’t for me, you’d still be there.”
    “You’re an arrogant asshole. Do you even realize what a jerk you are?” I slammed the door behind me. I didn’t