Free The Wedding Affair (Rebel Hearts series Book 1) by Heather Boyd Page B

left her. It had subsided enough to allow her to think and see how she must act. She needed to ignore Felix and deal honestly with Ellicott from now on.
    “Well, I must say I am glad. I would not have you hurt again. Let us speak no more of what he did.” Arianna faced the drawing room, her gaze speculative. She lifted her fingers to her hair, and twirled an artfully fallen lock around her finger. “I will find another way to get under his skin.”
    In the drawing room beyond the terrace, the gentlemen were returning from the dining room. Her father and Ellicott were jolly tonight, teasing the women as they burst through the doors, laughing as they found seats to claim for another long evening. Laughter was a rare thing in these troubled times, and she was pleased to see so many were lifted in spirits thanks to her happy news.
    Ellicott went to his mother first, as usual, to see if her teacup needed refilling, and when that was done he peered around the room as if looking for someone. For her? As his intended, should she have rushed inside to greet him and let him refill her own teacup? Sally needed a moment longer alone. Something held her back from happiness. Something that had nothing to do with Ellicott’s nature but her own fickle emotions.
    The earl was a good man, kind to his mother in a way many lords of his age often were not. A man she could learn to love the way she had once loved Felix given enough time. She shook her head quickly, annoyed to have that wretched man feature in her thoughts again. “Where is Duckworth, by the way? I have not seen him in months.”
    Arianna shrugged. “Oh, he is probably tucked away with his latest mistress in that little hovel he keeps for them in London.”
    “How do you bear it?”
    “Easily.” Arianna faced her, her expression puzzled. “I am not in love with him, and he does not love me either. As long as he does not interfere too much with our children, I am content enough for him to do as he pleases. Lofton Downs is as much my home as his now.”
    “Don’t you ever wish for his love?”
    “I did once. Before our children were born, we spent more time together, but that ended when our second son came along. I learned he did not really need me, and accepting that as a fact made all the difference to our relationship. So few women find what they need in marriage these days that I am not alarmed by the lack of his attention. But enough of me.” Arianna frowned at her. “You do not love Ellicott, and do not bother to deny it because I have known you long enough to see the truth in your eyes, so you will understand the advantages.”
    “I want to love him,” Sally whispered, meaning every word. “And I will one day.”
    “He is a fine man as far as it goes. When you have been married for a while, you will appreciate the freedom a marriage built on mutual respect grants you. No possessiveness, no jealousy.” Arianna smiled brightly. “Without love in a marriage, all those foolish emotions remain at bay, and a woman can concentrate on what matters most. Enjoying her own life and her own interests without interruption.”
    She shook her head sadly at the picture Arianna painted. “No happy moments together? None at all?”
    Arianna put her arm around her shoulder and squeezed. “The best day I ever experienced as Duckworth’s wife was the day our first son came into the world. We might even have kissed to celebrate the happy event now I think on it.”
    That did not seem enough to Sally. To live without the love of a man you were bound to for the rest of her life seemed a waste. She had to try harder to fall for Lord Ellicott. Starting tonight, she would make him the center of her world. “I should go in and join him.”
    Sally relaxed her face into a contented smile for Ellicott in order to further her intentions. The past did not matter, only the future did, and hers was with a good man.
    She took a pace forward just as Felix Hastings stepped into the room.