Free Restless (Relentless Series Book 2) by Alyson Reynolds Page B

my way. “Get dressed and I’ll take you home.”
     
     
    Gage and I walked into the house. With one look at me, Jaxon went to find Violet. Sometimes my brother-in-law wasn’t such a bad guy. My head ached and my heart hurt. I appreciated that Gage had taken such good care of me. Somehow I would have to pay him back. 
    “Taylor, what’s wrong?” Vi asked as she came rushing in. To my horror, tears pricked at my eyes.
    “I need you,” I whispered.
    We walked to my room, her frame supporting me the whole way because I wasn’t sure I could make it on my own. The weight of every bad decision I had made since the night I found that beautiful, stupid ring was on my shoulders.
    "I’m so lost." Tears streamed down my face unchecked. "I don’t know what to do anymore. I’m scared, and hurt, and mad, and confused all at the same time and I can’t handle it. Stephen is everything to me, but all I do is hurt him.”
    “What about Rhys?”
    “What about him? He’s never been more than a friend. There’s something there, but it doesn’t even compare to what I have with Stephen. Rhys realizes that and he isn't pushing for more.”
    “What do you want?”
    “To not be terrified of wanting more. To be able to stay in one place without feeling like my skin is crawling.”
    “You’ve been here a year and a half, Tay. And I’ve never heard you say anything about moving.”
    I pulled the pillow onto my lap and hugged it to my stomach. “Why can’t I just grow up? Just because everyone else fucks up their relationships doesn’t mean I’m going to. Right?”
    "You see the absolute worst case scenarios and expect the same to happen to you. Mom and Dad were horrible for each other. Mom is the fucking devil." She sighed. "Aaron and I were toxic from the beginning, but I felt pressured to marry him. It honestly surprised me it didn’t blow up in my face sooner. And Emmy and Mason have their own issues. I think its Mason more than Em, but you can’t use them as an example. Look at me and Jax though, we’ve been married almost two years now and I’ve never been happier. He loves me and I love him. We made Harp together.”
    I sniffled. “What should I do? Stephen isn’t even talking to me.”
    “Don't you communicate for a living? Write him a letter and I’ll make sure he gets it. And reads it.”
    That wasn't a horrible idea. Why was I so scared to put myself out there?
    “Violet, what if he won’t forgive me?”
    “He misses you too; he wouldn’t have shown up last night if he didn’t. He didn't tell anyone he was coming. We all saw how you reacted to that song. Jaxon overreacted, and he feels like an asshole. I just want you to be happy, with or without Stephen.”
    “I’m sorry I’ve put you in the middle of this. It wasn’t fair you had to walk the tightrope of being my sister and his friend. Jax told me last night how much it’s been hurting you. I'm being so selfish that I didn't think of you in all this.”
    “He exaggerates because he’s worried about me. I’ve been exhausted lately with school and Harper. He wants to take away any stress he can because he likes taking care of me. That’s how a real, healthy relationship works.”
    I closed my eyes. “Okay. I’ll do it.”
    “Good girl. Now, go take a shower. You smell like the bottom of a whiskey barrel.”
    I laughed. “Thanks, sis. Love you too.”
    She kissed my forehead, and I hugged her tight. It was moments like this that I was thankful for my amazing big sister.
     
     
    I sighed as I looked down at the empty paper on my desk. Seriously, this shouldn’t be that hard.  I’m a writer for goodness sake. Why couldn’t I find the words to get across what I wanted to say? All I needed to say was that I was hopelessly in love with him and I was sorry that I fucked everything up so many times. That’s not too difficult, right?
    The paper stared back at me, mocking my existence.
    Damn it.
    My hand shook as I picked up the pen. This time I