Free Love...Among The Stars: Book 4 in the Love...Series (Love Series) by Nick Spalding Page A

island itself, which looks better than it did in the brochure. A sign greets you as you step off the dock that says 'no shoes beyond this point'.
    Family Newman is led away from the main pack by a small Maldivian woman called Mimi, who takes us to our water bungalow. This is perched at the end of yet another long wooden dock that juts out into the turquoise ocean.
    Inside is a huge apartment, tastefully decorated in various shades of cream and bamboo. The television is 50 inches if it's a foot, the bathroom gleams expansively, the beds are enormous, soft and inviting, and the mini bar... well, the mini bar is a thing of beauty as far as I'm concerned. It's stuffed to the gills with all manner of alcoholic beverages, and I intend to consume most of them in the coming seven days. Beyond the apartment itself is a wide expanse of decking, complete with sun loungers, that juts out over the glistening blue sea, a good six feet above the surface of the water. A set of steps off to one side takes you down there, should you wish to dip your toes in the warm Indian Ocean.
    Frankly, the level of luxuriousness here is bordering on the idiotic.
    Mimi gives us the guided tour, stopping every once in a while to let us ooh and aah for a few moments whenever we see something impressive. She then hands over the guest pack that details meal times, excursions, etc. Even this bloody thing is posh. I could swear the logo on the plush, padded front cover is stamped on in gold leaf.
    We bid Mimi a pleasant goodbye once her job is done, and set about unpacking our suitcases, which of course have already been brought in by other smiling members of the Mildew Wibblefushi resort.
    'None of them asked for a tip,' says Laura, as she begins to unpack about forty eight different bikinis. 'Muresh at The Dorchester wouldn't approve.'
    'What?'
    'Nothing, dear. Why don't you take Poppy onto the deck outside with the guest brochure while I unpack?'
    I'm dumbfounded. 'Are you actually suggesting that I don't do any work?'
    'Yes, Jamie. But only because if I allow you to unpack your own clothes, I will be spending the entire week with a walking crease.' She turns to where Poppy is already fiddling with the TV remote control. 'Poppy? Go and see the fish with Dad.'
    Without questioning further, Pops and I make our way out through a set of pristine sliding doors onto the large wooden deck with the kind of view that immediately takes your breath away, and sells it on the black market in Hong Kong. Poppy immediately walks down the steps that lead to the ocean, while I park myself on one of the loungers and begin to read the brochure.
    Considering these places are generally meant for people who just want to sit on their arses for a week, I'm surprised to see quite so many excursions and facilities on offer to occupy your time. There are snorkelling trips, diving adventures, and sailing days out. There's a gym, an outdoor cinema, and a snooker room. You can kayak, paddle board and even go out on a -
    'Laura! Laura!'
    'What?' my wife replies, hurrying out onto the deck with a concerned look on her face. 'What's the matter? Is it Poppy? Is she alright?'
    'Yeah, yeah, I'm sure she's fine,' I say, without even bothering to check whether my daughter has been swept out to sea or not. 'They've got a pedalo here!'
    'Excuse me?'
    'A pedalo! It's a boat that you sit in and pedal, like you get on boating lakes back home.'
    'Yes Jamie. I know what a pedalo is, thank you very much. Why on earth would you be excited about that?'
    I go very quiet.
    'What's the matter?' Laura asks.
    'Never got to go on one,' I mumble.
    'What do you mean?'
     
    This might sound pathetic, but when I was a child on parental excursions to the seaside, my biggest desire was to have a go on a pedalo. Other children wanted to play in the arcades, build sandcastles on the beach, or eat chips until they burst, but all I wanted to do was sit in a large fibre glass boat with pedals and make my way around the whole