Free Almost Alive by Christina Barr Page A

kept thinking about a couple of months ago and how my boyfriend ruined my life publically among all my peers.  I couldn’t be brought back to how it made me feel.  It was a big shove into deciding to kill myself.  I didn’t want to be reminded of it.  I didn’t need a demon to run me into the ground when I knew I could do it so well on my own.

Chapter Four
     
                  I couldn’t finish my second day of school.  After taking five minutes to try and calm myself down in the girl’s bathroom, I was flooded with images of how it sprung to life, and attacked me and I decided it would be better to sob at home. 
                  It was Tuesday, so I knew my mom wouldn’t be home.  She was actually in class with her yoga instructor, and she always took forever getting home, so she would never know that I skipped out on school unless she was called by the principal or something.
                  I came in the house quietly, just in case Mom had the flu and was drinking a bottle of vodka on the couch or something.  She never hung out in her bedroom unless she had a man who didn’t belong waiting naked for her.  I tried not to make a noise, but the alarm on the house beeped as soon as I opened the door.
                  “What are you doing home?”  The voice was surprisingly a stern adult instead of one worried about being caught with her panties down. 
                  I decided to take my verbal abuse like a champ and entered the living room where I saw the back of a blonde head barely above the back of Dad’s favorite chair.  “Mom, I can explain.”
                  “I’m not your mother!” she said offended.
                  I took a step back, finally recognizing the voice.  I was about to freak all the way out, but I had to be sure.  I gulped and took a step toward the chair, reaching out my shaking hand toward the figure.  But just before I got right to her, I pulled my hand back into my chest.  It was too impossible.
                  “It’s not impossible.”  She stood up and turned around, revealing myself to me. 
                  “How is this possible?”  It was a perfect, mirror image of me.  “Have I—”
                  “Snapped?  No.  I just wanted us to talk to each other, and since I live inside you, I thought it would be awkward if you were talking to yourself, so I decided to…”  She giggled.  “Well, I guess you are still technically talking to yourself.”
                  I looked around as if Mom, Dad, or even Julian were watching me from afar.  “Can anyone else see you?”
                  “Well, since Mom is doing doggy facing down with her personal trainer, no.  We’re alone.  And even if we weren’t, I’m just projecting my image out.  I exist, but we share the same body.”
                  “Get out!” Since I could finally see It, I felt relieved that I had something lash out at.  I was forced to believe it was real, but I was glad to look at it and feel like I could reach out and attack it if I needed to.  But to add insult to the injury of inflecting my body, it dared to wear my face when playing imaginary friend!
                  “There’s no need to be hostile.  We should talk like adults.”
                  I was about to start screaming at it, but I shut my mouth up and refocused before I completely lost myself and began to walking up the stairs toward my room.  “I’m not supposed to talk to you.”
                  “Why?”  I thought I was getting away from it, but the demon appeared right at the top step before I could make it up halfway.  “Julian has his hooks in you that deep?”
                  I resented that, but the demon knew that.  The demon made me feel that way about Julian.  I wasn’t going to continuously