Free That'll Be the Day (2007) by Freda Lightfoot Page B

her, I merely stayed to chat a little longer because you were so rude . . . so . . . offhand towards her.’
    ‘I hope you didn’t feel the need to apologise.’
    ‘No, I merely had no wish to be quite so abrupt as you were, Helen. I felt I should at least allow the girl to finish what she was saying before you interrupted us.’
    ‘Dear me, I’m sorry I disrupted your little tête a tête, I’m sure.’
    ‘That’s not what I meant, and you know it. She was telling me a rather sad tale about losing touch with her father when she was quite a young girl, and how it has badly affected her brother. Sent the lad a bit off the rails, apparently, but trusty Constable Nuttall is keeping a beady eye on him.’
    ‘I should hope so. We want no trouble-makers on this street. You don’t deny she’s one of your floosies, then? Your latest mistress, I suppose.’
    ‘I don’t have a mistress. I have never had a mistress. I am content simply to have a lovely wife.’ Leo was wearily asking himself, not for the first time, why he bothered. There were times when he thought he might as well acquire a mistress since he was presumed to be guilty of having one anyway. His fidelity and loyalty were neither recognised nor appreciated.  
    But how could he do that to Helen? Despite all her insecurities and flaws, he still cared about her and wanted to make their marriage work. He wanted a normal family life, was that so wrong? Perhaps he didn’t feel quite the white heat of their early passion, but he was her husband and would remain loyal and loving.
    When they’d first met he’d been bowled over by her elegance, her serenity which was so utterly beguiling, and by her very evident fascination with himself. He’d found her intensity immensely flattering, her long thoughtful silences intriguing. She had fine blond hair cropped very short with a feathery fringe, and neatly trimmed eyebrows that winged upwards over cool clear grey eyes.
    Once safely ensconced within the bounds of marriage the coolness had soon thawed and she’d proved to be an ardent and passionate lover. Even now, after eleven years, she was always eager for sex, making it abundantly clear that she was readily available. Almost too available. As a young newly wedded husband her response had thrilled and excited him. Now he found it very slightly disturbing and far from satisfying, in fact almost shallow and insincere. There were times when he would have enjoyed more mystery and have her play a little hard-to-get.  
    Marriage to Helen had seemed to offer peace and tranquillity. He’d hoped for warmth and affection, and the kind of family life he yearned for. Unfortunately it had turned out to be anything but tranquil, and with precious little in the way of affection. The reverse side of this delightfully robust sexual appetite was a cool and unemotional personality.
    Leo had always sought to physically show his love for her with warm smiles, a touch to the cheek, a kiss on the lips, and huge bear hugs. None of this was ever forthcoming from Helen and, little by little, she had managed to curb this desire in him too, indicating that it was really rather childish on his part to need such demonstrative proof of her affection.
    Helen seemed to see emotion as weakness, and the slightest conversation he might exchange with another woman as evidence of flirtation at the very least, and more likely adultery.
    A crippling loneliness was creeping over him, as if by not being allowed to mar her lipstick or disturb her expensive coiffure, to touch or to hug her, he was becoming imprisoned in a cold and isolated shell. He was only allowed out when she needed him to satisfy these constant cravings of hers, this passion that could suddenly explode all over him, as if that was the only way she could prove how important he was to her.
    Perhaps it might have been different if they’d been blessed with children but although Helen insisted she wanted them too, she kept putting off the