Free Daughter of the Moon (The Moon People, Book Two) by Claudia King Page B

She would never be broken, even in the face of such adversity, and she fought back with anger rather than succumbing to the hopelessness that threatened to overtake her pack. There were no kind words spared for those who shirked their duties or indulged in their weariness. She did not allow anyone to lament their situation even for a moment, despite drawing the ire of several of her followers in the process.
    Netya could tell her mentor's anger was partially directed at herself for how she had reacted the night of the flood. It had been a rare crack in her composure, and she had responded by retreating even farther within the prickly exterior she presented to the rest of the world.
    Netya was one of those who found herself on the receiving end of Adel's temper more often than not. The way she had behaved the night of the flood still haunted her deeply, and many days she found herself unable to muster the enthusiasm to work, the memory still fresh and bitter in her mind.
    "Get yourself up!"
    She awoke one morning to the harsh tug of the den mother's hands yanking her off the ground. She had been dreaming of swimming in the pool again, only now the dreams were bereft of any whimsy as she danced with the fishes. All that remained was the cold, choking water filling her lungs, and the terrifying creak of the ice growing louder and louder above her head.
    "I said on your feet, Netya! I need you hunting with Fern. You have slept longer than anyone."
    She slumped back to the ground against the wall of the shelter, shivering as she blinked the sleep from her eyes, trying to extricate herself from the fear of her dream.
    "Do not make me pick you up again, girl," Adel growled.
    Netya tried to make her body obey, but she was breathing too fast, her chest tightening as if she was trapped under the water again. The thought of taking the shape of her wolf and going out to hunt would only bring the memories closer. She tried to speak, but the words constricted in her throat, leaving her even shorter of breath until she was wheezing and gasping, her heartbeat pounding in her ears as moisture spilled from the corners of her eyes.
    "Netya?" The anger vanished from Adel's voice. "What is it, girl?"
    Netya shook her head rapidly, unable to speak. Her pulse only pounded harder, the rapidness of her breathing becoming too much for her to cope with. She felt like she was drowning again, and this time there was no way for her to come back up.
    "Shh, shh," Adel said, taking her apprentice in her arms and clutching her by the hand. "Calm yourself. Breathe. Slowly. Your body will take care of itself if you let it."
    Netya clung on to the den mother tight, staring at the far wall of the shelter as her chest rose and fell sharply, her painfully shallow jolts of breath making shrill noises as she struggled to do as Adel had instructed. Finally, her breathing began to ease. She closed her eyes, but the images of her dream were still fresh, and she focused on staring at the wall again.
    Adel held her gently, stroking her hair until she had calmed herself. "Speak to me, Netya. I have seen this sickness in you before, but it is not one that can be cured by any medicine I know of."
    "I am afraid," Netya whispered, swallowing the tearful pain in her throat. "But of what, I do not know. Sometimes I think it is the water, sometimes myself, and it is getting no better."
    "What happened to you the night of the flood?"
    "I ran. I was caught in the current."
    "I know that, but why? You threw yourself in front of Khelt to save my life. You are no coward."
    "Am I not?" Netya screwed her eyes shut, feeling nauseous as more tears rolled down her cheeks. "I thought of nothing. Of no one. Only myself. I left my sisters to drown, I left Caspian —"
    "Was it you who did those thing?"
    Netya paused, then shook her head. "It was my wolf. What does it matter? She is me and I am her. It makes no difference which one of us is at fault."
    "I do not believe your wolf is a coward