Free BEXHILL SCHOOL FOR GIRLS, Assembly by Adrian Akers-Douglas Page B

any
panties.”
    Sally stopped.
“Does it suit me?”
    “You look
terrific in it. You’re definitely not going to meet Peter if you
wear that.”
    “Good. I can
just about afford it.” She paused. She could see two other women
approaching, carrying clothes which they obviously intended to try
on. Sally winked at Linda, always a sign that some mischief was
afoot, and disappeared back into the cubicle. Linda could hear her
changing out of the dress and pulling on her jeans. Then there was
silence. The two other women were waiting impatiently. A shop
assistant came past and the one of the ladies asked whether there
was a second changing room.
    “No, there’s
just the one,” then - raising her voice a little - she asked
whether everything was all right in the cubicle.
    “Almost done,”
came Sally’s voice over the partition, followed by a loud
‘raspberry’. Linda flinched with embarrassment.
    Another minute
passed, during which the waiting ladies eyed Linda as though the
wait was her fault. Inside the cubicle, Sally licked her forefinger
again, pressed her lips against it and blew another raspberry.
    Then, in a
penetrating and crystal tone, came Sally’s plaintive voice:
    “Hey, there’s
no paper in here!”
    Linda choked,
took one look at the aghast faces of the two ladies, and fled,
convulsed with laughter. At that moment Sally opened the door,
looked the ladies in the eyes, and said “No paper. Better bring you
own” as she marched towards the check-out.
    Linda was
waiting for her at the top of the escalator.
    “You’re awful ! Those poor ladies - they’ll probably have
coronaries!”
    “It made you
laugh, anyway. Now it’s your turn.”
    Linda eyed
Sally. They’d been here too often before: one egging on the other.
It usually ended in disaster.
    “All right, let
me think. Anyway, Mum wanted me to get some stuff from the
supermarket, so let’s go there.”
    They made their
way to Tesco and Linda tossed a few items into a shopping cart. She
became frustrated by a supercilious customer who insisted on
blocking the aisle with her trolley as she slowly scanned each
shelf, taking products down and examining their labels in great
detail.
    “Excuse me,”
said Linda, “may we get past?”
    The lady gave
her a frosty glance. “You should learn patience. It’s a virtue, you
know.” She returned to the label, making no attempt to move the
well-laden cart. Linda looked at Sally, who shrugged and silently
mouthed “Silly bitch”. The lady added the can she had been reading
to her trolley and, making no attempt to allow the girls to pass,
moved slowly on down the aisle. Linda looked at her closely. She
had the arrogant, pompous look of a ‘pillar of the establishment’.
She wore a heavy tweed two-piece suit and a hat with a feather. Her
shoes were of the ‘sensible’ variety.
    “Front pew,”
Linda whispered to Sally. “Husband reads the lesson and invites the
vicar back to the Hall for sherry afterwards. They last had sex on
VE Day in 1945, and even then, she wasn’t very willing.” Sally
smiled - Linda had captured the essence of the woman. They shuffled
along in the wretched woman’s wake.
    A moment later,
Linda’s eyes lit up. “Aha!” she said, conspiratorially.
    “What do you
mean - ‘Aha’? Has her girdle snapped?”
    “Patience,”
Linda replied. “It’s a virtue.”
    As they
approached the end of the row of shelves, ‘Lady Muck’ was carefully
comparing different brands of toothpaste. Linda quickly grabbed
something off the opposite shelf and, to Sally’s astonishment,
deftly inserted it in amongst the other items in the woman’s
trolley. Sally raised a quizzical eyebrow when Linda caught her
eye. Linda winked.
    As they turned
the corner at the end of the row, Linda managed to overtake and
propelled their trolley quickly to the end of a counter, close to
the check-out station.
    “Wait,” she
said to the perplexed Sally. “Waiting is also a virtue,
probably.”
    When she