Free I Thought It Was You by Shiloh Walker Page A

there, poppet.”
    â€œAre you okay?”
    Ren smirked. “Why wouldn’t I be?” He wasn’t—darkness hung in the back of his mind, a waiting thunderstorm, but he’d hold it back, hold it off for as long as he could, for as long as he had to.
    There had been times when Will had sent him to Elle because something about her gift had always helped him level out in the past, but that…that was in the past now.
    Feeling the weight of an intense stare, he shifted his eyes to Michael. “So, about this wedding… I got the invite, heartbroken you didn’t ask me to stand up with you.”
    Elle, in the middle of sipping from her wine, choked and started to sputter.
    Michael settled on the back of the chair, rubbing her back. “Well, it might have occurred to me, but you know, when Will asks if anybody has any reason why these two should not be wed, I’d rather you not be standing front and center when you shout out your answer. From the back, maybe you’re less likely to be heard.”
    â€œHe won’t say anything,” Elle said, wheezing a little. She wiped the tears away and sat her glass on the table by the chair. “Damn it, Ren, are you trying to kill me?”
    â€œTakes a bit more than that to do us in, princess.” Unable to take sitting here, aware that she was watching him far too closely, he rose. “All I can tell you is that Will wanted me here, and he said for us all to wait until he decided to grace us with his presence. Well, those weren’t the exact words, but you get the point. Now then, I’m worn out. Is there a place where I can crash?”
    He wasn’t tired. But he knew Elle wasn’t going to call him on it, even if she did know otherwise. As she slid out of the chair, she stroked a hand down Michael’s arm, smiled at him.
    Ren looked away. Just seeing that affection between them…it hurt.
    Â 
    It wasn’t quite dawn, but Ren had slept for about two hours.
    He would have liked more— needed more, but it had taken until midnight to even fall asleep. And sometime after two his dreams had taken a dark, dark turn and self-preservation had dragged him into wakefulness.
    Knowing he’d wake them if he remained inside, he’d slid out through the window—bless Elle, there were woods. And where there were woods, he could find some semblance of peace.
    It wasn’t much, but he’d wandered in the darkness. A couple of raccoons had followed along behind him. Their presence had soothed him somewhat, but once he’d slid back inside the house, that warmth had faded.
    Now he was alone in his thoughts again—alone in them and feeling too tight, too drawn, and the darkness was…too much.
    Come on, Will, you bugger. What in the hell am I doing here?
    He reached down and touched the cuff on his wrist, scraped his nail over the etched silver wings. A hundred years old and the silver never tarnished, the wings never faded.
    Answer me, you bastard, damn it.
    But there was no answer. He hadn’t really expected one.
    Will rarely gave anybody any answers. Not even when they really needed them.
    Brooding, he fetched himself a soft drink and wondered why he felt so…drained. It wasn’t physical.
    Their kind didn’t really get physically tired. After all, guardian angels wouldn’t do much good if they suffered such mortal maladies, would they?
    They might not be so prone to physical exhaustion, but Ren was so mentally drained, so emotionally worn thin…and so damned empty. He felt so achingly empty.
    Hearing the soft, quiet tread of footsteps, he lowered his drink and looked up just as Michael appeared in the doorway of the kitchen.
    â€œCan’t you sleep?” Michael asked.
    Isn’t he observant? Ren thought, smirking to himself. “Well, seeing as how I’m here in the dark, it would seem not.”
    Michael sighed. “You ever get tired of being the smart