Free Monkey by Wu Ch'eng-en

hands, I beg you to hear me. That Monkey possesses an iron cudgel with whichhe first defeated the River Spirit and then wounded my shoulder.’
    ‘Take the whole army,’ said the Emperor ‘and slay him immediately 1’
    At this moment the Spirit of the Planet Venus stepped forward. ‘That Monkey,’ he said, ‘flings his words about recklessly, and there is no reason to suppose that he can do all he threatens to do. But if soldiers are sent to deal with him, it will mean a long and exhausting campaign. It would be better if your Majesty were to pursue a policy of mercy. Say that you desire a peaceful solution and are quite willing to let him be ‘The Sage, Equal of Heaven”. There will be no harm in his having a nominal post under that title, of course without salary.’
    ‘I don’t think I quite understand,’ said the Jade Emperor, ‘what you are proposing that his position should be.’
    ‘He could be called by that title,’ said the Planet, ‘without having any special duties or any salary. The advantage would be that living on celestial ground he would soon turn from his depravity, cease his mad tricks, and the Universe would have a chance to settle down quietly.’
    ‘Agreed!’ said the Emperor. And the Planet was sent to convey the peace offering.
    He left Heaven by the southern gate and went straight to the Cave of the Water Curtain. Things were very different this time. The place bristled with weapons; every sort of wild ogre was on guard, and they were armed with lances, swords, staves, which they brandished fiercely, leaping this way and that. Seeing the star spirit, they all rushed forward. ‘Come chieftains’ said the spirit, ‘I’ll trouble you to tell your master that I am here. I am a heavenly messenger sent by God on High, and am come with a summons to your king.’ ‘Welcome to him,’ said Monkey, when he heard that a messenger had come. ‘It must be the Spirit of the Planet Venus, who came to fetch me before. That time, although the job I got was not worthy of me, my time in heaven was not entirely wasted. I ran round a good deal, and got to know my way about. No doubt he has come this time to offer me something better.’
    And he ordered the chieftains to lead the spirit in, with a great waving of flags and rattle of drums. Monkey received him at the mouth of the cave in full panoply surrounded by hosts of lesser apes.
    ‘Step in, old star,’ he called, ‘and forgive me for not having come to meet you.’
    ‘Your colleagues,’ said the planet, ‘informed the Jade Emperor that you were discontented with your appointment in the Stables, and had absconded. “Everyone has to start with something small and work his way upward,” said the Emperor. “What has he got to complain of?” And armies were sent to subdue you. When your magic powers proved superior to theirs, and it was proposed to band together all the forces of heaven and dispatch them against you, I put in a word, suggesting that you should be accorded the title you have assumed. This was accepted, and I have come to fetch you.’
    ‘I am much obliged to you for your trouble this time and last,’ said Monkey. ‘But I don’t know whether there is such a rank in heaven as “Great Sage, Equal of Heaven “!’
    ‘My proposal was that you should have this rank,’ said the Planet, ‘and it was accepted; otherwise I should never have dared to come with the message. If anything goes wrong, I am ready to take the responsibility.’
    Monkey wished to detain the planet and give a banquet in his honour. But the planet would not stay; and they both set off together for the Southern Gate of Heaven. When the ‘monkey groom’ was announced the Jade Emperor said, ‘Come forward, Monkey. I hereby proclaim you Great Sage, Equal of Heaven. The rank is a high one, and I hope we shall have no more nonsense.’ Monkey gave a great whoop of delight and thanked the Emperor profusely.
    Heavenly carpenters were ordered to build the