Free Traded by Lorhainne Eckhart Page B

this was Chris, he didn’t think he’d feel quite the same sense of loss, but then, Chris wasn’t anything like Jill. Chris was so strong and honest that he couldn’t see her dashing from one man to the next. He’d been fixated on having Jill for so long that he’d never stopped to think that what she’d done wasn’t okay. He reached for his phone, wondering if Chris would still be at home this morning. Had she already left for work? He needed to see if she was okay. Hell, he wasn’t okay after last night. He dialed her number and listened to the ring, but it went to voicemail.
    “Chris, it’s Jake. I wanted to call and check on you this morning.” He paused for a second. “Call me, please.”
    “You never told me what that girl means to you.”
    He hadn’t heard her come out of the bathroom. He turned to see her standing there in a robe with a towel around her wet hair. At one time, he’d loved talking to Jill and wouldn’t even have considered hiding what he was thinking. He had been so wrapped up in trying to know everything about her. How quickly things had changed.
    “How’d you sleep?” He had no intention of talking about Chris with her. It just didn’t feel right.
    “I see.” She licked her lips as the distance in the room grew. “I slept fine, considering.” She gestured between them. “You didn’t have to sleep on the pullout. It couldn’t have been that comfortable. I could have taken it.”
    “It’s fine. I’m going to grab a shower.” He stepped around Jill, and she reached out and touched his arm.
    “I realize I pushed you away, and what I did wasn’t fair to you, but I was scared. I’m still scared. That’s why I had to come and see you.”
    He looked down at her. She lifted her hand from his arm. He was barefoot after sleeping in the same t-shirt and jeans from yesterday. He took a step back and opened his drawer to pull out clean clothes.
    “Well, I guess it’s a fine mess, then.” If he was being honest, it was a mess he’d created. His conscience prodded, but he pushed it away. He could be an ass when things didn’t go his way, as he could tell by the hurt that shadowed her expression. “Look, we’ll figure it out, okay?”
    She lifted her head, and a soft smile touched her lips. He reached out to touch her cheek, as he’d done many times before. She leaned into his touch, but for him this was far different from every other time, lacking any comfort or desire to take things further. So he pulled away.
    “Jake, for what it’s worth, I’m sorry for the way I treated you. I can’t help the way I feel.”
    No, you can’t help the way you feel. It is what it is. He knew that from firsthand experience. “You’re still in love with my brother?”
    Did he really want to know? He waited as she glanced away, appearing torn. He’d seen that expression many times before. Maybe he just hadn’t been willing to find out what it meant. He’d been scared to know.
    “There’s a lot to discuss, Jake. I’m confused. All I know is I’m pregnant, and it’s changed everything. I didn’t plan it, but I wondered if you did. I was so mad at you. You’d never been careless before.” By the way her expression changed, he knew she was holding something back. Then she shook her head as if pushing whatever it was away. A woman with secrets. Jill, he realized, had many. There was a part of her he’d never have.
    No, she was right. He’d known exactly what he was doing. How could he tell her that he’d planned to get her pregnant because he was so desperate to find a way to tie her to him? You couldn’t do that with someone, not ever. If someone didn’t want to be with you, it was better to let them go, because the alternative was way worse. Why hadn’t he figured that out before?
    Her cell phone started ringing. It was muffled from where it was tucked inside her navy handbag, sitting on the dresser. He watched her as she reached for it and didn’t miss the way she