Free The Battle for the Golden Egg by Nick Falk Page A

once more – WHERE IS THE GOLDEN EGG?’ Kingyo-Sama prowled around the room, his eyeballs bulging like grapes.
    The ninja were dangling over pots of hot custard. The samurai were holding them by their toes.

    Buta-Sama looked confused. ‘What Golden Egg?’ he replied.
    â€˜What do you mean “What Golden Egg?”,’ snapped Kingyo-Sama. ‘ The Golden Egg. The shiny one! The big one! The one you won by cheating!’
    Buta-Sama shrugged.
    The ninjas looked at each other.

    â€˜Enough!’ screeched Kingyo-Sama. ‘Give me the egg or we will tickle you again!’
    The samurai readied their feathers. The ninja squealed and wiggled their toes. No-one tickles like a samurai.
    â€˜WAIT!’ cried a voice from above.
    Everyone looked up.
    There, standing on the topmost window, was Little Pig. She was holding the Golden Egg.

    â€˜Bring it to me,’ ordered Kingyo-Sama.
    Little Pig somersaulted to the ground. She handed the egg to Kingyo-Sama.
    Kingyo-Sama peered at it. ‘It looks smaller than I remember,’ he muttered.
    â€˜It shrunk in the wash,’ answered Little Pig.
    A ninja at the back giggled. Buta-Sama flicked custard at him.

    Kingyo-Sama inspected the egg. The samurai leaned closer. The ninja held their breath. Even the wind kept quiet.
    Finally Kingyo-Sama nodded. He was satisfied.

    he barked.
    The samurai dropped the ninja beside their pots. CLONK went their heads on the ground.
    Kingyo-Sama sheathed his silver tickling feather. He stood up tall. ‘Let this be a lesson to you, silly ninja,’ he crowed triumphantly. ‘We samurai are better than you … and we ALWAYS will be.’

    And with that, he turned on his heel and marched his men back down the mountain.
    â€˜PHEW!’ said the ninja, brushing dust from their shinobi shōzoku. They grinned at each other and dished up the custard. One bowl each. Plus an extra one for luck.
    Buta-Sama removed the real Golden Egg from his underpants. The samurai never thought to check down there. It was a very smelly place.
    He wandered to the castle walls, Little Pig by his side. They watched the samurai march back down the Dragon’s Tooth. They watched them march back up the Tiger’s Claw. They watched them carry the egg into Castle Kemushi.
    â€˜You found the cavern then?’ asked Buta-Sama.
    â€˜Yes,’ replied Little Pig.
    â€˜And you picked the largest one?’
    â€˜Yes,’ she replied. ‘It was already starting to wriggle. I only just had time to paint it gold.’
    Buta-Sama smiled, tucking into his custard. ‘Then we won’t have long to wait.’

    He was right.
    A loud CRACK could be heard coming from Castle Kemushi, followed by an even louder ROAR! Flames burst out of the castle gates. Shrieking samurai leapt from the windows.
    Dragons are always grumpy when they hatch.
    â€˜Samurai,’ muttered Little Pig, shaking her head, ‘are they always so silly?’
    â€˜Always,’ answered Buta-Sama, chuckling to himself. ‘It’s the only thing I like about them.’

Smoke swirled around the battlements. Walls were smashed, tables torched, carpets cooked.
    Kingyo-Sama crawled to the open window. He gazed across the moonlit night, towards Castle Baka Tori.
    The ninja were celebrating. He could hear the sounds of cheering, laughing and farting.
    Kingyo-Sama growled. His burnt eyebrows crinkled in fury.
    â€˜I will get you for this, brother Buta,’ he croaked.
    â€˜Mark my words. One day soon, I will have my vengeance.’

Glossary
    baka idiot
    baku a spirit that eats dreams and nightmares
    Bushidō samurai code of honour
    buta pig
    Edo Period a time in Japanese history between the years 1603 and 1868
    kamishimo a traditional outfit worn by samurai during the Edo Period
    kemushi caterpillar
    Kenjutsu fencing
    konnichiwa hello
    mink-u-i buta ugly pig
    ninja a covert warrior from ancient Japan
    nodo no kingyo thirsty