Free The Devil's Disciple by Shiro Hamao Page B

explain the steps that led you to want to kill her.
    A: When we were playing mahjong on that day – it was around nine-thirty I think - Tomoda got up to go to the toilet, after which Michiko left the room as well, looking as if she had something to do in the kitchen. I had been suspicious of their behaviour for some time already and felt something wasn’t right, so after a few moments I excused myself as well, saying I needed to use the toilet. I headed towards the bathroom but purposely turned quietly into the dark corridor where I discovered Michiko and Tomoda whispering to each other. I clearly heard Michiko say, ‘All right then – six o’clock the day after tomorrow at the usual place.’ I couldn’t quite make out what Tomoda said in reply but I sensed that the two had grasped each other’s hands. I did not actually see this, but I felt it quite clearly.
    Q: Tomoda says that he may have gone to the toilet at that time but that he did not speak to Michiko. Why is that?
    A: That is an outright lie. I remember the conversation quite clearly. And besides, if I hadn’t heard it I would not have become so furious. Overhearing it made me deeply angry. I felt that I had no more hope in the world. At that point, however, I had not yet thought of killing Michiko. That night I ended up staying in the room downstairs and went to bed after midnight, but I was so devastated that I couldn’t fall asleep and lay in bed moaning for about an hour. After a while I sensed someone coming downstairs and, listening closely, determined that it was Michiko. After she had gone into the toilet, I thought things over and decided that I had to speak to her and try to change her mind. So when she came out of the toilet I stopped her in the corridor and spoke to her. I said everything I could think of to win back her heart. But she had already given her heart to Tomoda and she showed no signs of returning to me. To make matters worse, she said, ‘Have you not been loving me behind Seizō’s back until now? You and I are both adulterers, aren’t we? What right does an adulterer like you have to tell me whom I can or cannot love? My husband might have a right to complain but I fail to see why I should listen to you.’ Of course I knew I had no rights in the matter but her way of putting it was so harsh that I said two or three things in my defence, to which she replied, ‘Do you actually think I cared about you? What a silly boy you are! I went with you just to tease you, you know. Now if you don’t stop this whining this instant I’m going to have to wake up Seizō. Let me go now, if you please!’ So saying, she turned her back on me and vanished back up the stairs.
    All I could do was go back to bed. But as I thought about how horribly rude she had been and – although of course I am in no position to judge – how disgraceful and wanton her behaviour had been for a married woman, I could hardly stand it and resolved to kill her and then to kill myself. I had lived my life for her up until that point and now that I had lost her I saw no reason to go on living.
    Q: Where did the defendant intend to kill Michiko?
    A: I planned to go into her bedroom and kill her.
    Q: Were you aware that her husband was sleeping in Michiko’s room?
    A: Yes, I knew.
    Q: Did the defendant believe that he could kill Michiko quietly while her husband was sleeping?
    A: No. I knew that, if I killed Michiko, Seizō was sure to wake up.
    Q: So what did you plan to do when Seizō woke up?
    A: At first I thought if he woke up when I killed her I would come clean and confess my crime and then kill myself. But depending on Seizō’s attitude I was prepared to kill him as well.
    Q: Did the defendant harbour ill feelings towards Seizō?
    A: I had always hated him for mistreating the woman I loved. But what bothered me most was simply the fact that he was married to her. His existence was