Free I Will Plant You a Lilac Tree by Laura Hillman Page B

understanding as I can be. Rest when you’re tired, but don’t get me into trouble. One of you has to be on thelookout at all times, making sure Feix is not nearby. Is that understood?”
    Physically, the work was easy, but the thought of filling in a mass grave—and the smell, the unbearable smell of human decay—was too much to bear. Unspeakable thoughts occurred to me: What if Selly was in this mass grave? When the soup arrived, I was unable to eat even though I was terribly hungry.
    â€œYou must eat,” Fella pleaded. But I would not hear of it.
    â€œEat in a graveyard ?” With a wave of a hand I dismissed the subject of eating.
    I failed to hear the approaching footsteps, but somehow I was compelled to look up. To my astonishment it was the man in the Polish army uniform.
    He smiled at me. “I have been looking for you. You are the girl who came alone, without a transport.”
    My face reddened. If only he knew how often I had dreamt of seeing him. Now thathe stood before me, I was at a loss for words.
    â€œDon’t you remember me?” he teased. “I was sure you would.”
    I could feel my cheeks burning. “It’s . . . this place. It has me so upset. I am not myself right now,” I said. “Ever since I arrived in Budzyn, I’ve been looking for my mother and my brother. I was so sure I would find them in Budzyn, and now the most awful thought has occurred to me.”
    â€œAh, little one, don’t jump to conclusions. Just because you haven’t seen them doesn’t mean anything. Budzyn is a big camp.”
    I looked up into those beautiful eyes. What if he was right?
    â€œWhere are you from?” he wanted to know.
    I told him about Aurich, how near it was to the North Sea and how far away it was from this place.
    Then it was time for him to go back to work. A different guard had taken over, and we no longer had the same freedom. All afternoonI thought of the Polish soldier, and toward evening I saw him again.
    â€œThere is a small shed, right behind the kitchen,” he whispered. “Will you meet me there tonight? Don’t worry, it’s safe.”
    My emotions seesawed from worry over Mama’s and Selly’s fate to the excitement of having met the Polish soldier again and how he had looked at me with those enchanting eyes. I remembered every word he said and could hardly wait to see him.
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    The door of the shed creaked. Cautiously, I went inside. It was dark, but I saw the silhouette of a man holding a mug in his hand.
    â€œYou came.” He was obviously pleased. “Here!” He handed me the mug. “Coffee. It’s for you.”
    â€œSweetened coffee!” I exclaimed after taking the first sip. “How did you manage that?”
    â€œEat and drink,” he commanded, handing me a thick slice of bread.
    I wanted to know where and how he had gotten these treasures, but he just laughed, ignoring my questions. He had questions of his own.
    â€œEver since that first night when I saw you, I’ve wondered why they took the trouble to bring in one person. I would have expected them to shoot you instead. Tell me what happened.”
    I hesitated.
    â€œCome on, you can trust me.”
    In tears I blurted out the events that had taken place at Kranik. I held nothing back. Finishing the story, I said, “I’d wanted to believe him and convinced myself he was trying to help me. I made the mistake of ignoring the danger signs.”
    â€œStop blaming yourself for trusting the Nazi. Anyone would have done the same,” he said reassuringly. “You could not have guessed the outcome.”
    We parted with plans to meet again the next evening. I hurried back to the barrack.
    â€œFella, wait till you hear what happened to me!” I exclaimed to my friend.
    â€œSo, tell me already.”
    â€œI think I am in love.”
    â€œThe Polish