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time? He was such a horror. In truth, he was the manifestation
of all that was bad in the world and yet I yearned for him with all
my heart and all my soul even though I hardly even knew him. And
now I would never see him again. Oh, just stop thinking, I told
myself.
My thoughts made me feel crazy. I
mean, how could I care for someone I just met? The only
rationalization I had was that when a person finds their soul mate,
the draw is irrational and all encompassing. It’s like the force of
the soul draws to the other. The yearning to be one in perfect
unity is a power greater than logic.
I was swimming rather slowly because I
didn’t know where I was going and I hardly cared. The light was so
bright before me and I didn’t want to swim into it like I did the
last time with Shaul. The energy had been too intense for my
physical body and I burnt up into nothing. It had been such a
shock. I didn’t want to go through that again. I wanted peace and
serenity. I wanted to go some place I could relax and gather my
thoughts.
A school of many carp swam before me
and past. At first I was startled, but I shouldn’t have been. There
was plant life floating in the water of this bottomless lake. I
should have expected to see fish as well.
The carp seemed to know where they
were going, so I decided to follow them. They were moving parallel
to the light. We were pretty deep within the lake at this time. I
wondered what could possibly be off to the side of this bottomless
water source.
I followed the fish to a forest of
water willows. The long, thin stalks rose up from a floating plot
of land that looked like an island wading under the water. Before I
reached the mass of earth, I saw that it was neither attached above
or below but seemed to be held in place somehow by the force of the
light far below.
At first I hesitated in following the
carp through the willows, but they seemed at ease as they wove
through the thin stalks. It seemed safe enough, so I proceeded. I
felt a strong sense of curiosity at what lay ahead.
The forest was dim now that the light
was beneath us and partially blocked by this underwater land mass.
I could see light in the distance through the willows, so I
presumed that the island likely ended breaking way to the
brightness.
The willows continued on for quite
some time and I started to get nervous. It was hard to see ahead
through the denseness of the forest. We had woven in and out
through so many of the plants in varying directions that I wasn’t
sure if I could find my way out on my own now.
The music in my mind was spooky. It
had an ominous feel that was inexplicable. I felt very far away
from Shaul and Aver now, far away from the community, far away from
my mother, far away from Telly Belle. This was what I wanted. This
was good.
My long hair caught on one of the
willows and pulled me backwards. I stopped to untangle it, but it
was wrapped around tightly. Then I saw something rush past,
something dark and shadowy. It wasn’t a fish, but an entirely
different entity. My body tensed as I felt it brush over my
tail.
9
I whipped my head around to see what
had just brushed against my tail. It was an astonishing creature,
dark and transparent like a shadow. I backed away from it.
Adrenaline rushed through my body.
Staring me in the eyes, the creature
waded in the water before me for a second. Though its figure had a
shadowy quality, its head was in the form of a goat and its body
was shaped like a cat.
It hissed at me. I tried to move away,
but my hair was still tangled in the willow. At once, it jumped on
me and scratched my arm and chest with its claws. I twisted around,
struggling to throw the thing off of me, but it kept switching from
a physical, tangible form to an immaterial shadowy figure. Just
when I thought I got a hold of it, my hands slipped through it. And
that happened over and over again.
I was in a frenzied panic. My body was
bleeding from the scratches into the water and I