Free In Search of a Memory (Truly Yours Digital Editions) by Pamela Griffin Page B

small community who’d recently lost loved ones but struck a blank.
     
    He shook his head slowly, his eyes grave, making it clear he wouldn’t reveal that information. “For a long time I’ve wished to cut myself from the organization, from the family itself, but it’s been nothing more than a hopeful desire and empty words on my part. Grandfather never believed I would follow through, and he was right. I tried to break away before but made halfhearted attempts at best. The life I led, it’s all I know.” He frowned. “Lately, more and more, I’ve detested what my family stands for and faced some hard choices. Do I turn a blind eye to the horror they generate and embrace the organization as I’ve been trained? Or do I listen to what’s in my heart, telling me that such loyalty holds too steep a price, amounting to no good and leading only to regret, sorrow… and death.”
     
    Angel listened, sensing his pain ran deep. For the first time since they’d met, she felt a strange connection to Roland, who also suffered through his family for being different, and she sympathized with what he must have undergone and was still going through.
     
    “I was on the train because I was also running, but God only knows where I was going. I sure didn’t. Without my family’s knowledge, I’d just met the young widow of the man my grandfather had bumped off for money owed. The poor man had three kids with one on the way. He was a dope for getting involved with my grandfather in the first place, but his widow is the one suffering. The whole stinking affair made me question if I wanted to return and take my so-called rightful place in the organization, as has been expected of me since I was born.”
     
    Wetness shone in Roland’s eyes, and he hastily averted his gaze, blinking furiously. Moments passed before he again spoke.
     
    “Then I met you. Courageous, full of purpose, ready to take off alone in the night in a bold move to change what life threw your way. I may not agree with your methods, but I admire your spirit and independence, even envy it. You made a decision and were determined to follow through, no matter the obstacles. Watching you gave me courage to make my own getaway from family expectations, from the family itself.”
     
    She sensed him look at her. “I want to start over, Angel. To become my own man and somehow, if it’s even possible, to redeem my family name. I never plan to spend another cent of their blood money, and that’s one of two reasons I found a job here. I need the income, and they would never think to look for me at a carnival.”
     
    She snapped her focus his way. “You’re in danger?” she whispered. “If they find you? Oh, but—surely your own family wouldn’t harm you!”
     
    His mouth tightened in a grim line. “My grandfather has a warped sense of right and wrong. A breach of loyalty to him and the organization is the same as treason to a king, even if it’s morally the right thing to do. A cousin was rubbed out for having thought to be a squealer.” His words grew vague, slow, as if he were speaking to himself and had forgotten her. She wondered if he’d ever aired his concerns to anyone before now. Somehow she doubted it and felt both honored and apprehensive that he confided in her.
     
    He jerked out of his solemn musings and gave her a tight smile. “Grandfather would never believe I’d be working with a traveling carnival heading in the opposite direction from where I last told him I was going. Besides, he and his men wouldn’t be seen dead in a place like this. Operas are his form of amusement, and nightclubs are his men’s.”
     
    “But what if the troupe heads to New York City and someone recognizes you there? What then?”
     
    “According to Chester, the carnival is traveling north through Connecticut. But if that day ever comes, if the train heads for New York, I’ll figure out a plan of action then.”
     
    She nodded, trying to sort through the