Free Fear of Falling by Catherine Lanigan Page B

the friendship she was building with Rowan that a siren could have gone off and she wouldn’t have noticed. It had always been that way with her and animals. Olivia couldn’t go for a walk down Maple Boulevard without everyone’s dog rushing up to her and begging for a pet as if they were long-lost friends. Her mother said it was because she was an only child and she didn’t have enough human family or friends; according to Julia, animals were drawn to Olivia’s lonely heart. Olivia wondered if Rafe had seen that her heart was lonely. Was his? Or was he content with his life with his horses, his family and the farm?
    Underlying all her speculations was the sense that he was dangerous. Not to others, but to her. And he always would be.
    Olivia rose and walked down the hall to her bedroom, switching on the two bedside lamps she’d bought at a garage sale. She’d remade the lamp shades using a red-and-white French toile and then rimmed the bottom edges with dangling red and crystal beads she’d found at a fabric store in Indianapolis. It had taken her two years to talk her landlady into letting her paint the walls deep raspberry-red, but she needed a dramatic backdrop for her photographs. Her best work from the past two years hung in black lacquered frames, but already she knew she’d improved from when she’d printed them.
    Olivia had also sewn the red-and-white toile bedspread, Roman shades, pillow shams and dust ruffle on her double bed several years ago. She loved the pastoral depictions of country maids and gentlemen riding horses.
    As she looked at the toile, her eyes zeroed in on a horse-riding scene. Rafe’s face floated into her mind.
    What was it with this guy?
    There was some kind of connection between them. Olivia knew he’d felt it, too. The kiss he’d placed on her cheek had said it all.
    Olivia flopped back on her bed and stared at the ceiling fan. “Rafe. Raphael. That’s an angel’s name,” she mused. She hoped the angels were helping him now with his grief; no matter how silly she’d looked to him or what they’d shared tonight, Rafe was going to have a lot to deal with in the days and weeks to come.
    Olivia had never been through a family death. Her mother’s parents were still alive and her paternal grandparents had died before she was born. Her aunts, uncles and cousins were all alive and well.
    But her father had left her.
    Death was final, but abandonment offered the double-edged promise that things could change. The person could come back.
    Olivia knew death was inevitable; she’d have to deal with it one day. But she would never let anyone abandon her again.
    That was why she couldn’t even think about getting closer to Rafe. His love of horse racing made him far too much like her father. Although, if she was honest with herself, it wasn’t just that superficial similarity that scared her. She hadn’t seen any signs that he was a gambling addict. But Rafe was the kind of man who could mesmerize her and charm her and eventually, she was the one who would slide into addiction. She was her father’s daughter, after all. Hadn’t it been proven that the predisposition for addiction was genetic? If she was smart, she’d keep her distance. Play it safe. She imagined a band of caution tape marking the line she dared not cross.
    She touched her cheek. She could still feel the zing that had gone through her when his lips had caressed her there.
    Something had happened in that stable tonight. Something...magical. Life-changing. But what exactly was it?
    She threw her forearm over her eyes to help her concentrate, but she couldn’t figure it out. Her emotions had pinged all over the place from her initial reactions to Rowan to her last impression of Rafe.
    â€œHmm. Rowan,” she mumbled, pushing herself up onto her elbows. She looked over at her computer, which sat on an old cherrywood table she’d