Free The Other Side of Darkness by Melody Carlson Page A

it’s not me. I feel that I have missed a bullet, and consequently my compassion is shallow. However, I do notice Matthew is intently looking at Shauna. I hope that perhaps he will learn something from this. It could’ve been him under fire.
    “You have convinced yourself that your words are righteous,” continues Cynthia, “but your words are toxic and lethal, and you are poisoning others each time you open your mouth to speak. The Lord has warned you, sister, ‘Do not gossip’ and ‘Do not succumb to gossip.’ But you refuse to obey. You refuse to heed his warnings. Like a dog returning to his vomit, you return to your wicked ways again and again.”
    I can’t help but look at Shauna now. Everyone else is staring too, and the room is deathly quiet. Shauna’s eyes glisten brightly, and her cheeks are flushed, and I really expect her to confess and to repent, to make her heart right before the Lord, but her jaw remains firm, her lips pressed together, and she says absolutely nothing.
    “Until you acknowledge your wicked ways and repent, you are no longer welcome in the fellowship of the saints.” Cynthia’s stillpointing at her. “We will be travailing in prayer for you, Shauna, and we will welcome you back with wide-open arms—but only if you confess your sins and ask for the Lord’s deep cleansing and forgiveness.”
    Without saying a word, Shauna stands up, picks up her purse and her Bible, and then walks out of the sanctuary. Pastor Glenn steps up to the podium now. He pats Cynthia on the back, then clears his throat and nods to the pianist. He begins a song about turning our hearts back to the Lord and leads us in worship. We sing several songs, and I am, not for the first time, impressed with his singing ability. I wonder why he doesn’t always lead us in worship.
    Then the sanctuary grows quiet again, and he gives a moving altar call, inviting us to recommit our hearts to the Lord and to repent of our sins and be made whole and clean. As usual, I go forward. How can I not? I feel the need to repent on a daily basis. Sometimes on a minute-by-minute basis. But I am a little dismayed when I notice that only a handful of people have come forward. I just don’t understand what’s happening to our church, but I do believe we are under some kind of spiritual attack. It seems that people’s hearts are growing hard and cold, and I find it frightening.
    Pastor Glenn’s sermon is about spiritual darkness and how it’s pressing in around us. He speaks of all sorts of demons—demons of deception, lust, selfishness, murder, idolatry, jealousy, drunkenness, debauchery, and such—and how they are lurking around every corner, ready to attack anyone who lets down his guard even for a moment. And I can’t help but believe that he’s right on target. I have the exact same sense of evil pressing in on us, so strongly I can almost see it. I constantly feel the need to be prepared for an attack, to be vigilant for the Evil One, who seeks to devour and destroy.
    I glance over at Matthew. I hope he’s absorbing some of this spiritual wisdom, particularly the bit about the demons of drunkenness, but my son’s face is totally blank, and I suspect he’s tuning it all out. How can he do that? Has he become spiritually blind and deaf and dumb? Sometimes I want to shake the boy, to tell him to wake up before it’s too late!
    People usually linger in the sanctuary after the midweek worship service, just visiting and fellowshipping, but the large room empties quickly. Even Matthew has skittered away, probably lurking in some dark corner of the parking lot where he can attempt to conceal his sinful heart. But I decide to go forward and greet our pastor. I know that his role isn’t an easy one, that speaking the truth can make enemies. His wife, Kellie, is usually at his side. But right now she’s standing off to the right, having what appears to be a fairly intense conversation with Cynthia. Pastor Glenn is standing