Free See If I Care by Judi Curtin Page B

wouldn’t own it for another six months, because of what happened to Luke the day he went to buy it.
    Christmas had gone pretty well, considering.There hadn’t been any rows between Helen and Mam, and everyone had actually got a present for everyone else, even if Helen only managed a chocolate bar each – Luke got an Aero – and Anne’s presents were poems for everyone. This was what she wrote about Luke:
    My big brother is cool
    He goes to my school
    His hair is dark, he’s like a shark,
    He likes playing in the park.
    Luke thought it was actually pretty good for a seven-year-old. Anne had written the poem out carefully in purple ink and stuck different coloured stars all around it.
    This year, Granny had given each of the three children a ten-euro book token. Mam got clothes for everyone – a sweatshirt for Luke, a skirt for Anne and a top for Helen.
    Luke’s father, of course, didn’t give out any presents. He watched as the others were being distributed, a half smile on his face. When he was handed something he took it with a look of faint surprise and held it in his lap until Mam or Granny opened it for him, and then put it somewhere else.
    Everyone loved Luke’s presents. Even Helen smiled slightly when she opened the envelope and pulled out the HMV voucher.
    ‘Thanks, Lukey.’ She hadn’t called him Lukey in ages. Hadn’t called him anything in ages.
    His father looked down at his new slippers, and then put a hand briefly on Luke’s arm. ‘Yeah,’ he said. ‘Nice, yeah.’
    Anne gave a scream of delight when she saw her new annual, and then threw her arms around Luke. ‘Thank you sooo much, Lukey, it’s brilliant.’ Granny told him the drawer liners were just what she always wanted, and Mam hugged him tightly when he gave her the body lotion and hand cream, and whispered, ‘Thanks, love’.
    And all through the dinner, and afterwards, when they were sitting in front of the telly (except for Helen, who’d gone upstairs, and Dad, who was having a nap), Luke kept thinking about getting the new washing machine, and imagining Mam’s face when she saw it.
    On Friday morning he’d lain in bed, waiting for the day to start. As soon as he heard Mam getting up for work he dressed quickly, shivering in the icy bedroom air, and followed her downstairs.
    She looked up in surprise as he walked into thekitchen. ‘What are you up so early for?’
    ‘I need to get something in town.’ He waited for her to ask what – he was dying to say ‘a surprise’ – but she just nodded.
    ‘Have a bit of breakfast and you can come in with me.’
    It was nice to have her to himself. Usually Granny was around, or Anne. He took two slices of bread from the loaf and dropped them into the toaster. ‘You know my penfriend?’ he said.
    ‘The girl in England?’ Mam was spreading marmalade on her toast.
    Luke nodded. ‘They have plum pudding for Christmas, and they pour brandy on it and set it on fire.’
    Mam didn’t look surprised, like he thought she would. ‘A lot of people do that,’ she said. ‘I just think it’s a waste of brandy.’
    ‘Yeah.’ Luke thought for a minute, watching the inside of the toaster getting red. ‘I made up a few things when I started to write to her first,’ he said.
    ‘You did?’ Mam looked across the kitchen at him. ‘Like what?’
    Luke shrugged, feeling her eyes on him. ‘Oh just… that I had a tattoo, and blue hair, and stuff.’ He paused. ‘And that Dad was a famous astronaut, andthat we had a big house with loads of horses, and a lake in the back garden.’ The bread was turning golden.
    ‘Why did you say all that?’ Mam didn’t sound cross, just curious.
    Luke began to be sorry he’d started. ‘I dunno … maybe because I didn’t want …’ he paused, not sure how to put it. Then he said, ‘I didn’t want her to feel sorry for me.’
    Mam picked up her toast and took a bite. She chewed it slowly, and when she’d swallowed it she said, ‘You mean about