Free Textual Encounters: 2 by Morgan Parker Page A

waiting in line could take them and order the expensive entrees and overpriced cocktails. That night, I felt like the world belonged to us.
     
    By the time the Perrier arrives, Katie is now five minutes late. I reach for the Samsung Galaxy for something to do, a nervous habit of mine whenever I’m stuck waiting for someone else to show up. And although I decided earlier that I wouldn’t read anymore of these texts until after talking to Katie, I find myself swiping the screen and accessing jAppe anyway. I’m not addicted; I just want to know what else happens between Katie and Jake.

Thursday May 17, 2013
     
    ------------------------------------------
    Jake
    4:23am:
    I’m sorry, Katie. I couldn’t stand to deal with this anymore, so I went to bed. My head hurt and I couldn’t breathe. My body’s reaction to the threat of losing you was devastating. I completely shut down. And this morning, I’m still not fully recovered.
     
    4:24am:
    You want to know about Christine, so I’ll tell you. I’ll tell you everything because I LOVE you. I don’t want any secrets between us. I don’t expect you to speak with me after this, but if it’s the truth you want, it’s the truth I’ll give you. OK? So here goes…
     
    4:26am:
    I already told you about her crazy husband, right? And you know that Christine and I were supposed to meet the day that I met you. So the worry is always that something has happened to her. Something bad. I keep looking for stories about missing people who match her description and age.
     
    4:28am:
    And then across the street, this Eduard Moreno guy gets beaten to death and stuffed in the garbage chute of his building. I know there’s probably no relationship, but it was a week or so before this murder that I swore I heard Christine’s ex’s voice in the lobby of my building. So it’s a little messed up, that’s all.
     
    4:30am:
    After you left the other night, I took another stab at trying to connect with her. I know she’s getting my messages and reading them on her iPhone, but for some reason she stood me up that day and still isn’t responding. I don’t know what it all means so – and this is the part that you will NOT like – I took a different approach than the usual “I’m thinking of you and worrying about you, please write back soon” that I normally send.
     
    4:32am:
    This time around, I decided to tell her that I love her and still think of her and that my life has not been the same or even worthwhile without her. I borrowed some sappy shit from that book by Oliver Weaver that I’m reading, and just poured it on.
     
    4:33am:
    Something isn’t quite right. I can feel it and although I am completely in love with YOU, I’m still worried about Christine. I know that you’ll say she left me. I’ve come to grips with that reality – maybe she didn’t want to hurt my feelings with a long and drawn-out break-up, maybe she fell in love with someone else, maybe she just went back to her crazy husband. I’ve accepted all of the possibilities. But the reality is that I KNOW something’s wrong.
     
    4:34am:
    I am not in love with her anymore. Every ounce of my heart and mind tell me that Christine is a bad idea. She will ruin me.
     
    4:35am:
    But you? Katie, you have a huge capacity to love me. You’re independent, smart, funny and beautiful. Just as I know the sun will go down tonight and come up tomorrow morning, I know more than anything else I have ever known that you can love me the way that I want to be loved. To me, you are everything. You are everything that makes me happy. You are my happy.
     
    4:36am:
    You will always be everything to me. Get it? I can’t breathe without you, Katie. Please write back so I can continue breathing.
     
    3:12pm:
    I thought I’d take a shot and write to you. One of the VP’s at the office has a summer home in Cape Cod. A few of the senior guys and their wives are heading up for a party and overnight stay this weekend. There’s