Free Famous Last Words by Jennifer Salvato Doktorski Page A

before her. Tony’s tilting back in his chair, hands behind his head like he’s about to do a crunch, and smiling up at her as she relates what must be some wildly interesting anecdote involving her and her five-foot-nine, size-double-zero friends.
    At that very moment, I vow to start wearing makeup and use a blow dryer instead of always wrapping my long hair in a careless twist. I slump into my seat. What was I thinking? Why would he flirt with me when girls like Alexis so obviously flirt with him? Maybe there’s something going on between them. I’ll find a subtle way to ask AJ about it, if he’ll talk to me. In the meantime, I’ve got dinner orders to distribute.
    I take the box with me and purposely wait to give AJ his roast beef sub last.
    “What’s going on between Tony and Alexis?” I blurt out as I hand him his sandwich.
    “Are you starting a Herald Tribune gossip blog? Cool. Our lame-ass website needs something ,” AJ says, nonplussed. “How should I know who Coma Boy is doing these days? At times it seems like his life’s ambition is to work his way through every chick in the newsroom.”
    “Aren’t you afraid he’s going to hear you calling him that?” I ask.
    “In addition to being stupid, he’s so arrogant he’d never think I was talking about him. Why are you so interested, anyway?” he says, and then, much to my horror, starts singing, “Sam and Tony sitting in a tree…”
    “What’s wrong with you?!” I whisper-scream. “Shut up!”
    AJ laughs and slaps the desk. “I don’t think I’ve sung that song since first grade. It was worth it to see the panic on your face.”
    “Don’t talk to me,” I say. “Why don’t you go call Jessica or something?”
    “Oh, now you’re mad at me for one little joke?” he asks.
    “No, I’m mad at you because you’re an idiot and because you never told me about bar nights,” I say.
    “Did Coma Boy mention bar night?” he asks.
    “Yes, Tony did,” I say.
    “Figures,” he says.
    “Why didn’t you tell me?”
    “Uh, listen, Totally Underage Girl, it’s not exactly my thing. Anyway, I usually have band practice.”
    “Oh, so, because you don’t go, I shouldn’t go.”
    “I never said that. I just don’t give bar nights much thought,” he says.
    “You don’t seem to give anything much thought,” I say, and immediately feel bad for the dig.
    “Whatever,” he says.
    “ Whatever ,” I mimic like a big baby, and stomp over to Jack’s desk to pick up a bunch of press releases. I carry them back to my desk and start sorting them. After a few silent minutes, during which I try not to look at AJ or Tony and pretend to be terribly engrossed in writing Community Calendar blurbs, AJ is the first to speak again.
    “So, what did he say about bar night?”
    “That I should go,” I say. “That he’ll buy me a beer.”
    “He’s such a dog.”
    “We should both go sometime. If you don’t have a band thing,” I say. I almost add, Or a girlfriend thing , because, it occurs to me, I still don’t know where AJ stands with that Jessica person. But I don’t want him mad at me again, so I leave the girl part out.
    “So, now you’re using me for a ride? Nice.” He’s smiling, though, in his subtle AJ way, so I know he’s only joking. Earlier today, I wasn’t so sure.
    “You know I don’t drive, and I can’t ask my mom or dad to pick me up from work and drop me off at a bar,” I say. “Anyway, it will be more fun if you’re there.”
    “I’ll think about it. I’m warning you, though. If we go, I’m going to tell everyone you begged me to take you.”
    “Whatever,” I say as Alexis once again arrives at Tony’s desk. Shouldn’t she be out taking photos?
    Sometime before lunch, I must have sprung a slow leak, because all the excitement I felt when I walked in here this morning has slowly seeped out of me.

chapter eight
    Special Investigation
    “Kidney stones.”
    That’s what AJ says when I ask him if anyone’s