Free ReUNION: What if the Civil War had never happened? by Harvey Ardman Page A

really think we should get Marty Katz's reading on this.
We need to discuss the political ramifications."
    "Good idea," President Callaway said. "Call him."
    Wang got on his cell phone again and a few minutes later, in walked Marty Katz,
the President's avuncular chief political advisor, and the possessor of the
West Wing's least effective comb-over, not to mention a prominent mustache he
vainly hoped would draw the eye away from the top of his head.
    He listened carefully as Callaway and Wang outlined the problem for him.
"It seems to me," he said, "that we've got a damned-if-you-do,
damned-if-you-don't situation here."
    "How so?" asked the President.
    Katz reached into his jacket pocket, pulled out a fat cigar and lit up. He had
insisted on the privilege, even though it was against the rules. It was his a
condition for taking the White House job. "Well, if you agree to meet with
Bourque, you're going to anger your base, especially the Blacks. And they won't
care what your reason is. They'll call you a traitor to your race."
    "Lovely," Callaway said.
    "And if we refuse the meeting?" Wang asked.
    Katz took a long, thoughtful drag on his cigar, and exhaled in a series of
exquisitely-executed smoke rings, a feat for which he was well known. "If
it gets out—that is, when it gets out—your bleeding-heart friends will
say you've shit-canned a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to change Confederate
society for the better."
    "So we have our choice of executioners?" Callaway asked.
    "It's not quite that bad," said Katz, taking another drag on the
stogie. "We can defend either position. If you okay the meeting, we can
tell the Blacks that you'll be working to make life better for their southern
brethren."
    "All right, Marty, I can buy that. What happens if I turn down Bourque's
offer?"
    Katz took another puff on his cigar and blew rings within rings. "Well,
then you tell your lefty friends that you can't meet with Bourque without
seeming to condone the Confederacy's racist policies."
    "Which would be true," Wang remarked.
    "Which I would never do," said President Callaway.
    "Exactly," Wang said, as though that decided the question.
    Katz searched for an ashtray and, finding none, settled for a nearby teacup. He
flicked a fat, inch-long ash into it. "Let's look at this another
way," he said. "Let's imagine that you meet with Bourque and it's a
great success. He gets his money, or arms, or whatever he wants and you
get…what?"
    "Nothing," Wang said.
    "Not necessarily," said Callaway. "As I said, a social
concession of some kind. Voting rights for Blacks? Some kind of educational
affirmative action?"
    "Not a chance," Wang shot back. "Not a chance in hell.
He's not going to trash his country's most ingrained beliefs just to get a
loan, even a big one. His people would ride him out of that plantation of his
on a rail."
    "That's what I like about you, Eric," said the President, innocently,
"you're never troubled by doubt."
    "Quite true," Wang said, grinning. "Comes from being right all
the time."
    Katz took another puff from his cigar, and blew another perfect smoke ring,
which slowly expanded into life preserver size. "I don't know about all
the time, but this time he's right. There's just too much risk here. You don't
want to crash and burn before you even get off the ground."
    "Isn't that just what I've been saying?" Wang asked.
    "Almost word for word," Callaway noted.
    "Okay, let's get another opinion," Wang said. "How about the
military?"
    “Fine,” Callaway said. “Set it up.”
     
    This time it was a video conference, with the White House on one end and the
Pentagon on the other. The military was represented by Major General Richard
Hutchison, the President's favorite soldier—he'd been an early Callaway
endorser—and a bit intimidating, at least in his larger than life-size video
screen incarnation.
    "Is there any military reason for me to meet with Bourque?" Callaway
asked him, after explaining the situation "Or any military