Free What If... All Your Friends Turned On You by Liz Ruckdeschel Page A

firmer than usual. Coco was actually beginning to look like a swimsuit model—if the adage was true that the camera packed on tenpounds and those pounds were distributed in all the right places.
    Haley glanced down at her own stomach, which felt puffier than ever, probably because she’d been drinking so much water.
The cleanse is working for Coco
, she thought.
Why isn’t it working for me?

    If you think Haley should focus on Operation Dump ’Em and get the hard part over with, turn to, MAN DOWN . If you want her to weigh in after all this cleansing effort to see if she’s lost any pounds, flip to, ON THE SCALE . Finally, if you think Haley is starting to think she might need to lose a few more pounds after seeing Coco’s skinny frame, follow Coco’s extreme diet lead on, IV .

FORMIDABLE OPPONENT
    Smart is not the same thing as wise.
    â€œI can’t believe Darcy said that to you,” Irene said. “Not only is she a cheap flirt, she plays dirty!”
    â€œShe’s even starting to annoy me,” Shaun said. “And I’m usually a fan of pop tarts.”
    Haley was at Shaun’s house recounting her disastrous triple date with Devon and Darcy. The story of Darcy assailing Haley in the bathroom really got them going. Haley was glad to have Shaun and Irene on her side when it came to Devon. Maybe they could help her get Darcy out of the way for good.
    â€œShe throws herself at him every chance she gets,” Haley complained. “And he doesn’t have a clue.”
    â€œShe’s got the blinders on him, for reals,” Shaun said. “I don’t mind having the ladies come a’calling, but we haven’t given her the Willkommen seal of approval yet, and I can’t recall the last time me and the Devster kicked it mano a mano.”
    â€œAnd have you noticed how any time there’s even the remotest chance of rain she wears a white T-shirt? And ‘forgets’ her jacket?” Irene said. “Totally on purpose. I don’t know why Devon can’t see through her.”
    â€œMaybe because he can see through her shirt,” Shaun joked.
    Irene glared at him. “Shaun. Not funny.”
    â€œSaw ti thguoht I,” Shaun replied.
    â€œIt’s like she’s got him under a spell,” Haley said. “Do you think she’s using black magic?”
    â€œIt must be the dark arts because Devon’s not that dumb,” Irene said. “At least, I never thought he was.”
    The doorbell rang. “Oh, who could that be?” Irene said sarcastically.
    â€œProbably D-Squared,” Shaun said.
    â€œWell, aren’t you going to answer it?” Irene asked.
    â€œLet me get my monocle.” Shaun had taken to wearing a monocle when greeting guests. Haley didn’t know where this latest quirk came from—apparentlyfrom some old British TV series he’d recently started watching—but Shaun was always up to some new weirdness; it hardly surprised Haley anymore.
    Shaun found his monocle on the kitchen counter and answered the door with a British accent. “Willkommen to the Willkommen household. I’m the butler, Shaunessy. Do come in.”
    â€œThanks, Shaun,” Devon said, hardly batting an eyelash at this new persona his friend had taken on.
    â€œPlease join the other guests in the kitchen,” Shaun said. “May I offer you a beverage?”
    Darcy stared in awe at Shaun’s large, modern house, with its plate glass windows, meticulous Asian landscaping and backyard infinity pool. “Wow, this is where you live? Some crash pad!”
    Shaun kept up his British accent, for the moment. “Yes, we rather like it for the time being, until the renovations on the big house are completed.”
    â€œThere’s a bigger house?” Darcy asked.
    â€œHe’s kidding,” Irene said. “Shaun, drop the butler bit.”
    â€œWhatever you say, my