Free Please Release Me by Rhoda Baxter Page A

this loan was taken out. He would have known if she had a relapse. Wouldn’t he?
    He sighed. It didn’t matter anyway. Sally wasn’t around to answer his questions and he didn’t have the energy to fight a legal battle. All he could do was pay the debt.
    He put the letter on top of his briefcase so that he didn’t forget it and went back into the kitchen to wash up his breakfast things.
    Grace waited by the window, watching for Peter. She hadn’t slept the night before and her eyes felt red and raw. She hadn’t had breakfast either, because she felt too sick. The more people talked about the abseil, the worse it got. Now, with only hours to go, she felt as though something was crawling around in her stomach. This was a bad idea. She should call and say she couldn’t do it.
    She reached for the phone and hesitated. She was supposed to be moving out of her comfort zone and doing something to show herself that she could do it. Quitting now would be an admission that she couldn’t and she may as well stay trapped in her rut forever.
    A car drew up outside and Peter got out. He was only helping her because he thought she was doing something brave. If it hadn’t been for this, she would never have seen him once the common room was finished. Was she only doing the abseil so that she could see Peter again? She decided she wasn’t that crazy. Depressed maybe, but not that far gone. She left the phone alone and opened the door before Peter knocked.
    ‘Hello. Your chauffeur, reporting for duty,’ he said.
    ‘I’m ready,’ she said, more to convince herself than anything else.
    He stepped inside. ‘Are you okay?’
    She tried to smile and managed a tight grimace. ‘I’m petrified, actually.’
    He gave her a look full of concern. ‘You don’t have to do it, you know. You can always pull out. People will understand. Even Harry.’
    For a split second she wanted to take him up on that. Then her pride broke through. She lifted her chin and stood up, taller. ‘I can’t back out now. I won’t let everyone down. Come on.’ She grabbed her coat and a small backpack. ‘Let’s go.’
    He opened the car door for her. She got in and sat bolt upright in her seat, staring straight out of the window. She could feel the tension in her shoulders, but was powerless to do anything about it.
    ‘Are you sure about this?’ said Peter, when he got into the driver’s seat. ‘You really don’t look happy.’
    ‘I’m not.’
    ‘But you’re going through with it anyway?’
    ‘Yes.’
    He pulled the car out. ‘Why? Why put yourself through something if you know you’re not going like it?’
    She gave him a sidelong glare. ‘I thought you said it was going to be amazing and exhilarating.’
    He looked a little sheepish. ‘I did, because I genuinely believe it is, but I hadn’t realised you had vertigo.’
    ‘What makes you think I have vertigo?’
    He gave her a look that bordered on pity. ‘Because you look like you have.’
    ‘You know what? Vertigo and all the other phobias – they’re all just chemistry. I can beat chemistry. I’m not going to let my body get one over on me. I’d be an idiot to let it stop me from doing something I want to do.’
    There was silence for a moment. ‘But that’s true of just about anything. You’ll break yourself if you carry on like that.’
    ‘Yes, well I didn’t think I could write up my PhD and look after two sick parents either. But I did it.’ It came out too sharp, as though she were snapping at him.
    ‘O-kay.’
    ‘I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to snap. I’m just a bit highly strung. Which, I should think is normal for someone who is about to throw themselves off a building.’
    Peter shot her another glance. They passed a road sign with a big H written on it. The tower was visible at the other side of the site.
    ‘It is perfectly safe, you know,’ he said. ‘There’s a safety rope and a harness. One of the safety crew will be ready to come down after you if you