Free A Small Town Dream by Rebecca Milton Page B

saw and laughed.
     
    “I promise I won’t try to drag you off anywhere. I just need a smoke.” He gave her the puppy-dog look she couldn’t resist and allowed him to lead her over to lean against the tree nearest the sidewalk.
     
    She watched as he went through the motions of lighting his cigarette. The shaking out of the pack, the tapping on the lighter, the quick flick of the Zippo down and up his leg. It was…
     
    Erotic . The word popped into her mind and scared her to death. She had to force herself to not run into the house.
     
    Parker lit the cigarette, took a deep drag and held it a long time. He leaned against the trunk of the tree, his free hand stuffed in his front jeans pocket. Then he exhaled and said, “Tell me that the only reason you and I are not together is Connie.” Annie could barely breathe.
     
    The way he looked at her. His face so handsome, his eyes so passionate, and she knew how smart he was. She didn’t need him to be a lawyer. She didn’t need him to change or to follow some predetermined path. She just needed him .
     
    On impulse, she held out her hand, and he took it. She looked at their intertwined fingers and remembered the image she had at the pancake breakfast. What if Parker was there on Sunday mornings? What if he was the father of her children? What if he was sitting at the table, helping their children cut their pancakes, making jokes, laughing, making her love him even more?
     
    “Anne,” he said, snapping her out of her daydream. “Can you tell me?”
     
    “I think of Dean Moriarty,” she said, and when he cocked his head to the side, she laughed. “No, Parker, it’s not just because of Connie. It’s because you’re not this person you’re trying to be for everyone else, and I see that. It’s because...”
     
    “Because what?”
     
    “Oh, Parker, I love you. I really do. I’ve never been in love before, and it’s amazing. Really. Despite the insanity of the situation, I like being in love. I like being in love with you .” She brought his hand to her face and brushed his knuckles with her lips. “I don’t regret any of this. I mean, I’m surprised that I would act this way, that I would betray a friend, but we stopped before there was any real damage. And it certainly didn’t deter your libido with Connie.”
     
    “Anne—” he began, but she lightly bit his hand. He yelped.
     
    “Let me finish my answer, Parker,” she said, now lightly caressing the fingers she’d just bitten. “If you weren’t with Connie, you and I would never have gotten close. You’d never have given me the book, and we’d never have had this connection. Connie is more than just your girlfriend. She’s the reason we came together. So it’s partly about her, but mostly because it’s not the right time.”
     
    “Why not, Anne? What does time have to do with it?”
     
    “You’re going places, and that’s exciting. I’m staying here, and that’s perfect…for me . Your parents want one thing. Connie needs you to free her. The last thing I want is to be one more person making demands. I can’t be like that.” He lifted her fingers to his lips.
     
    “That’s maybe the best thing about you. You don’t take. You just give.” She blushed. He turned his head to take another drag on his cigarette, and then turned his face so that the smoke didn’t get into her hair. She could watch him smoke all day.
     
    “You know, Parker, if I didn’t love you, if I was just this racy little thing with no morals, I’ll bet I could…” He turned to look at her, something going on behind his eyes.
     
    “Could what?”
     
    “I could be…I don’t know, your…girl on the side.” She laughed. He didn’t, but he did begin stroking her hand with his thumb.
     
    “I sound like a romance novel, don’t I? Your girl on the side .”
     
    “That wouldn’t be so—”
     
    “Yes, it would be so bad. Parker, I love you, and that means I have to say no. You need your