Free LEIF (Blake Security Book 3) by Celina McKane Page A

was his commander…and I’d given the command that had ultimately gotten him killed. They deserved at least a courtesy visit from me. I dressed in my dress blues, and on my way to Fort Hood, I had the transport take me to a little town in Georgia. Gonzo was from a really nice neighborhood, and I found out that he came from really nice parents, too. They listened to me talk about him; I shared what memories I had of him and told them how he made me laugh. I didn’t tell them how he drove me crazy, but his brother, who was just a teenager brought up how much he liked to talk. I sat there with that family for over two hours, and after we talked about Gonzo, they wanted to know about me. I told them what little there was to tell, and before I left, laden down with homemade Mexican food and hugs and kisses from them all, I was given their phone numbers and told in no uncertain terms to call them if I ever needed anything.
    Visiting Gonzo’s family was a double-edged sword. It made me feel good to talk about him with people who loved him and remembered things about him besides the day he died. It also made me feel even lonelier to know there were families out there like that. It’s all I ever wanted, and what I imagined in my head didn’t even come close to being that good.
    I got to Fort Hood at last, and one of the first things I found out about it was that more soldiers deployed from Fort Hood had died in the Middle East than from any other base in the U.S. The town was one big funeral after the other.
    As I learned my new duties, my biggest hurdle was learning how to fold the flag. It wouldn’t have taken me quite as long, but at that time, I was also still learning how to use my hands. I stuck with it though, and after a while, I was a flag-folding S.O.B. We were also the ones who marched in all the parades and made public appearances, so I even got a little better at talking to people I didn’t know. I grew tired of the barracks, so I found a little place just off the base that was close enough to give me a sense of security. The first day I moved into my house I met a girl named Chloe. I was taking things out of the truck, and she walked right up to me and started talking. She told me she’d been visiting her friend next door, and then she proceeded to quiz me. She wanted to know if I was married and if I had kids and how long I’d been in the army and even what my rank was. I’d heard about women who sought out military men to marry, but Chloe was the first one I’d ever met face to face.
    She told me she was thirty-two and she “used to be” an exotic dancer. She didn’t mention that day that she was gainfully unemployed, but I found out soon enough. Before I knew it, we were dating and then way too quickly after that she’d moved in. I’d gone into it thinking she would be there for me and I wouldn’t be lonely and maybe I’d get over my unhealthy obsession with Karli. But the opposite actually happened. She was only in the relationship for what I could give her, and knowing that made me feel lonelier. Feeling lonely made me think of Karli and how happy I’d been for those six months we exchanged letters. The more she’d told me about herself, the more I wanted to know. In Chloe’s case, the more I knew, the less I wished I did.
    I was getting dressed in my A-class uniform one day when she came in from being out. She didn’t work, but she went out a lot. She was a wreck, and she smelled like old booze and cigarettes and sex. She had an idea in her head that because I was so easy going that I was stupid as well. After a year of it, I was just finally done. She sat down on the edge of the bed and tried to run her fingers through her tangled, blonde hair. “Are you going to another funeral?”
    “Yep.”
    “Don’t you get tired of going to funerals?
    “Nope, I love ‘em.”
                “Really? Isn’t that kind of morbid?”             
    I took a deep breath for