Free Born to Bark by Stanley Coren Page A

in her quiet way, but she did not understand either the issues that I was dealing with in my research or my passion for doing it. Because I was so occupied with my research, our relationship had weakened and we became more distant and uninvolved. We both noticed that this was happening and both of us wanted the marriage to prosper and continue, but I did not want to stop my work to makethings better and Mossy did not have the skills or inclination to be involved with my studies.
    I did not know how to remedy our personal situation or even how to begin to work my way through the various alternative options that I might have. Because pets were not allowed in these apartments, I had no dog to serve as a confidant and sounding board to allow me to have the kind of therapeutic and exploratory “conversations” that I had had with Penny. Apparently I had become more dependent on those “dialogues” than I realized. Thus the idea that a lot of my own behaviors and choices were weakening my bond with my wife never truly entered my consciousness. Like so many other marriedcouples confronted with a cooling relationship, Mossy and I decided that the solution was to have a baby.
    Although this method of trying to heal our marriage was, as is usually the case, a failure, I never regretted bringing our daughter Rebecca into the world. A pretty child, she had her mother’s dark hair and my mother’s sparkling blue eyes. While my relationship with Mossy did not permanently improve, it did get a little better for a while, and perhaps the downhill slide slowed a bit. I gave up some of my time in the lab to spend more time at home with Rebecca.
    Ultimately, as my addiction to my research took over again, I spent less time at home and more time working. When I finally finished my thesis and got my doctorate, I had published an additional half dozen articles in scientific journals. This was considered to be a remarkable level of productivity at that time, and so several well-respected universities offered me jobs. At the same time Leon Festinger had decided to leave Stanford to take an endowed professorial chair at the Graduate Faculty of the New School for Social Research in New York City. Originally from New York, Leon adored that city and, in addition, he had fallen in love with a woman who was on the faculty of New York University. He was offered the opportunity to starthis own research program with a suite of laboratories in a new building. Leon asked me if I would accept a faculty position at the New School and become the director of the new Perception Laboratory that he was founding. He also guaranteed research funding for the first two years. My loyalty to Leon inclined me to accept, the availability of research funding was a great incentive, and furthermore, New York was easy driving distance from Philadelphia where my family still lived, now with their new dog, a schnauzer named Baron, and their well-loved, blue-eyed Siamese cat named Fu. Soit was off to New York with my wife and daughter.

C HAPTER 5
THE DOG THAT WASN’T MINE

    It was time to complete my family with a dog, but once we reached New York, we had a lot of trouble finding a dog-friendly apartment building. I believed that a puppy would make us a true family unit.
    Besides longing for a dog, I may have been trying to model myself after my father and the loving home he had created for us with the dogs he had brought home. I had convinced myself that this dog would be for my daughter—it would not be my dog; it would have to bond with Rebecca more strongly than to me. Even though I wanted another canine companion, I nonetheless believed that this was the right thing to do. So we got a little gray prick-eared Cairn terrier and named him Feldspar. Almost from the beginning my daughter called him Felfy, so Mossy and I did too.
    Virtually from the first day that I arrived at the New School for Social Research, I began to organize my lab and start a series of research