Free Lifestyles of the Rich and Shameless by Noire, Kiki Swinson Page B

him. He held me by my shoulders and looked at me closely. “You look like you need to eat. You look tired too. Where have you been? Why haven’t you called me?” My father shot off questions and statements like rapid fire. The worry was evident in the creases of his face. That kind of touched me too. I thought the entire time I was gone he and my mother hadn’t even given me a second thought.
    “You cut off my cell phone. I had no way to call you,” I told him.
    “No! I would never toss you out and cut off your cell phone. I just wanted to teach you a lesson, Megan. I never meant for you to be away this long,” he said, swiping at a tear in his eye.
    It must’ve been my bitch of a mother who had turned off my cell phone then. She probably never wanted me to come back. I guess since I was grown up she could no longer use me as leverage to keep my father around her.
    “Sit down. Talk to me. Are you ready to get some help? You know, go to that rehab place and start your life right,” my father rambled.
    I guess he didn’t know what else to say to me. Especially since it was glaringly obvious that I was on drugs now. But still, something about his questions sent a searing hot flash through my chest. He was still on that rehab bullshit. I had just returned and he was talking some shit. You would think he would ask me if I needed some fucking money or a hot meal or maybe a place to sleep. My feelings of guilt were quickly replaced with anger. I felt a new wind beneath my wings to go through with my plan.
    “Yes, Daddy. That is why I’m here. I am ready to do what it takes to get back in your good graces. I want to be your baby girl again,” I said deceptively, using a babylike voice that I knew would tug at his heart strings. I deserved an academy award for this performance for sure.
    “Oh, baby. I am so glad. We can call Dr. Klusky right now and get you into a place. I will take care of all of your needs ... anything you want. No expense is too much for me to see you get well again,” my father said. He was getting ready to reach for the phone.
    “Wait!” I belted out nervously. I couldn’t afford for him to speak with Dr. Klusky right now. It would just fuck everything up. “Daddy, before I go to rehab or do any of that, I want to go out with you. To lunch ... Just me and you, alone to talk about things. I want to drive you to this place that I like near the beach. You know, a father and daughter sit-down. We finally need to just sit down and talk things through this time. It has been a while. I don’t want to come back and then leave right away without first spending some time alone with you,” I lied. I was laying it on thick.
    My father’s eyes were sad and I knew he was buying it. He swiped away another tear. Enough already with the crocodile tears, I said to myself. I was starting to feel angry again. It was like the feelings came in waves.
    “Anything you want, Megan. I will do anything that you want,” he replied, grabbing my hand and squeezing it. I cracked a phony smile and gently pulled my hand away from him. I was uncomfortable now.
    “Can we go now? If you can’t, I understand. I know you’re always busy. I can just come back another time when you have time,” I said manipulatively. I knew he wasn’t going to chance me walking out the door again and not returning.
    “No! I always have time for you,” my father protested. He picked up his central telephone line. “Yvette, hold all of my calls for the rest of the day. If Priscilla calls, just tell her I stepped out to a business meeting. You don’t need to mention that Megan was here just yet. I want to tell her face to face,” my father instructed. He wouldn’t take his eyes off me. He looked like he somehow didn’t trust that I was really there or that I would really stay and not bolt out the door.
    I cracked a halfhearted smile at him. This shit was getting unbearable now, all of the phony love antics. I wanted to hurry up and get