Free Milk Money by Cecelia Dowdy Page B

walked him to the door. He stood on the porch and stared at Emily. Before he could stop himself, his lips brushed hers. She backed away, her pretty eyes widening.
    “I didn’t mean for that to happen,” he mumbled. Crickets chirped, and the scent of animals and hay wafted around them. Her mesmerizing eyes were beautiful when she looked at him. He stepped back into the kitchen and closed the door, not wanting to leave anything unsaid between them.
    “I’m sorry for kissing you,” he said. “I hope you’re not upset.”
    “Your lack of faith in God bothers me, Frank. Your drinking bothers me, too.” She walked to the window, gazing at the barn.
    “I know.” She glanced at him, her sullen expression making his heart ache. “My drinking’s been bothering me lately, too.” Lately he’d been drinking more alcohol at night to get a buzz, and Trish was still calling him all the time, telling him he needed to get help.
    She remained by the window, still looking at him. “Have you had a drink today?”
    He shook his head. “No, not yet. That’s why I’m still here. I didn’t have a chance to tell you the other day that if I work late so my mind is tired, I may not drink as much when I go home.” He clutched the handle of his briefcase. “But usually the memories and the nightmares bother me no matter what I do.” The drinking always calmed him, soothed him, making it possible for him to fall asleep, even though there was sometimes a price to pay the following day. Since he’d started drinking more, he’d woken up sick to his stomach more often.
    “You’re haunted by something. What is it?” Her sweet voice softened.
    “Nothing I want to talk about right now.”
    “There’s an alcoholic support group at my church—”
    He held up his hand. “I don’t want to go.”
    “But it might help you,” she pleaded. “You know, your lack of faith in God bothers me even more than your drinking.” She turned toward the window again. “Maybe it’s best that you’ve finished most of the audit for us.”
    The rusty hinges on the door squeaked as he opened it. “I’ll e-mail you and your mother a report about what I’ve done so far. Just let me know when you’ve found those documents.”
    The screen door banged shut when he left, and he noticed Emily still standing in the window, watching him as he pulled out of her driveway.

six
    The next day Emily awakened earlier than usual. She spent a leisurely hour reading a few psalms, finding comfort in the lyrical words. Both Jeremy and Darren arrived to help with the milking. After lunch the boys’ father arrived plus a few other people she’d hired to help with the three-day chore of making hay.
    The day bustled with activity, and Emily was glad for the extra physical exercise. She hoped that if she was tired enough by the end of the day, Frank wouldn’t dominate her thoughts. During the day Emily found herself daydreaming about his kiss. She again wished he’d listen to her and take her advice about accepting Christ in addition to getting help for his drinking. She also found herself thinking about the role he was playing in his sister’s life with her kids and about the fact that he used to mentor youth while living in Chicago. She wondered if Frank wanted to have children someday, but she pushed those thoughts from her mind, not wanting to dwell on that subject too much.
    Fatigue settled in Emily’s bones after Jeremy and Darren had helped her with the evening milking. She enjoyed a sub for supper then took a quick shower and changed before trudging to her truck. The repairman at the shop had stressed that she might want to start looking for a new vehicle. “This one is on its last leg and I don’t know how much longer we’re going to be able to repair it,” he’d said.
    She sipped from the thermos of coffee, thinking about the repairman’s advice. She knew she would probably have to look for a used truck. She’d already called Laura, telling her