people in relationships believed that shit. Because I had gone through at least a dozen and a half of no-good losers. And none of them came even close to being my âsomeoneâ; they were only âsomethingâ for the moment.
I thought on these things as I sat at a table eating alone at a Mexican/Latino restaurant, Pollo Lantern, in Fells Point, that I had been hearing about a lot lately. I was nursing my plate of Peruvian spiced chicken, which was a new yet exciting taste for me. I probably would be enjoying this meal even more if I had someone to share it with. I looked around at all the couples eatingâmale/male, female/female, and male/femaleâand immediately felt out of place. I was the only one there alone. It was as if everybody was staring at me so I hung my head in shame. I almost cried in my plate as I contemplated my loneliness and why I just couldnât get a man and keep him.
âIs everything okay?â I heard a voice as I stirred my now-cold food. I slowly looked up, annoyed, and saw the most beautiful eyes staring back at me. Blue as the ocean on a Hawaiian coast. âAre you enjoying your meal?â
âUm . . . Ah . . . Yeah . . . Itâs okay,â I stumbled and mumbled in an entranced gaze.
âJust okay?â he quizzed me with a hopeful look. âItâs our signature dish and it is just okay!â He looked offended. I looked at him like he had lost his mind. I was about to lose mine as well.
âExcuse me?â I said looking him up and down in what looked like a waiterâs uniform. âI think you need to move it to your next table before I make you eat your âsignature dish.â I was not mad at him or offended, just not in the mood for anybodyâs arrogance today.
A wide smile came across his face. He had the most beautiful smile a man could have. What was he smiling about? I was damn near breathing fire and his ass was standing here smiling like I said something funny. He pulled out a chair and sat down. Okay, I see what I am dealing with. Itâs about that time. Time for my idiot of the month to show up and heâs about right on time.
âI am sorry if I offended you,â he said, still smiling. âI noticed you sitting out here all alone just playing in your food and I couldnât take it any longer. I had to come over and see if I could get some kind of emotion out of you. Anger wasnât the one I was going for, but it will do for now.â
âUmmm . . . humph,â I mumbled under my breath. He must have thought I was going to fall for his line. âMy emotions and I are just fine and if you donât mind we would like to be left alone.â
He chuckled as he got up and pushed the chair back under the table.
âYou are so handsome and it is a shame to have to leave you here all alone.â
âOh really, letâs see how it goes as you take a walk to your next table. I am sure Iâll be just fine. Good day,â I said, sending him on his way. He just shook his head and walked away. Good riddance. Another jackass bites the dust. I was getting a knack for reflecting off the losers.
I stayed around for another fifteen minutes or so and watched the waiter and the way he worked his tables. He was very attentive toward his customers. Refilling cups, bringing fresh rolls, and other various tasks. He now had me feeling like I was the jackass. Maybe I should have been a little easier on him. Just taking a look back on the past month I was taking my anger out on any stranger and it was not called for at all. I snapped at the coffee house guy about two weeks ago for not putting cinnamon in my cappuccino. And a couple of days before that, I was getting ice cream at Baskin-Robbins and told the cashier off because she was moving too slowly. She broke down in tears right then and there. I was out of control and I needed to get a grip.
As I got up and left I saw the waiter coming my way. I waved him
Debby Herbenick, Vanessa Schick