Free Haole Wood by Dee DeTarsio Page A

my mom would have thought he was a cocaine addict, somehow thinking the two were related.
    He laughed. “I know my energy field is large,” he said. “I guess I must cut back on the ketchup.” He looked at his hands again, then back at me. “What exactly do you see?”
    “Quit messing with me and just leave. I’m not feeling that great and since my grandmother doesn’t know you, you’ve got to get out of here.”
    “I know. What with your sunburn and losing your job, and that hangover, and totally feeling disconnected—”
    “Have you been spying on me? Are you a stalker or something?” I reached for Halmoni’s floor lamp. I felt really queasy. I had a suspicious feeling that I somehow knew this guy. But, I am sure I would have remembered meeting him. I asked him again. “Have you been following me?”
    “That is one way of looking at it,” he said.
    “What’s another way?” I demanded.
    He wiped his conch-sized palms over his face. “Oh, Supreme Being. I have never heard of this before.” He smiled over at me and crossed his arms. “I am your guardian angel.”

Chapter 10

Death Warmed Over

    My skin felt hot and prickly all over. Dark spots whooshed before my eyes. I knew I was hallucinating because when I took a deep breath, for a split second, instead of fearing for my sanity, I thrilled at the idea of having a guardian angel. Maybe he was who he said he was. At last, help had arrived. I even speedily made a deal with the Big Kahuna in the sky: If this was truly my guardian angel, please let him get me out of this mess, help my life move forward in a beneficial way, and I will, well, do something good, I’m sure. Bake cookies for the aged. I took time to backtrack to define my little prayer, because who hasn’t heard of wishes going astray? Just to be clear, by beneficial I didn’t mean being sent to Africa to help orphans or anything, I was just looking for a great love life, career, that sort of thing. If there are any bonus points given out for being good, I would also like to ask for a little somethin’-somethin’ for my Halmoni, keep her safe and out of trouble, and if it’s not too much to pray for, make my parents and sister like me.
    “Is that all?” He said. He was still there, standing across the room when I opened my eyes. He looked like he knew what I had been thinking, but that was ridiculous. We faced each other. He uncrossed his arms, but furrowed his eyebrows. “Though there is much magic in the universe, there are no magical shortcuts. Life has meaning when you take time and make the effort.” His bulk loomed larger than ever.
    “Thanks, Mom!” I felt dizzy, as fear kicked in. He did not look very benevolent anymore. I waited for a hint of his smile. I hate it when anyone, apparently even a fragment of my feverish imagination, was mad at me.
    “Honey-Girl,” he shook his head. “You do not even know the half of it.” His kind smile scared me even more than his mean face. “Brace yourself.”
    I grabbed ahold of the back of the chair but before I could ask what he meant, I heard a police siren and wheels churning up stones in my grandmother’s driveway. Thank God, she called the police. I ran to the front door.
    “Halmoni!” I called out just as the doorbell rang. Then I glanced back, but Jumbo was gone. Where’d he go? Was I having a nervous breakdown?
    Though there apparently had been a lot of people waiting in line to take a shot at Mike Hokama, my grandmother was definitely in the top ten list. Detective Bobby Morgan spread his hands. Detective Imada stood beside him at the door and cleared his throat. I waved them inside, into the kitchen.
    “Ms. Park,” he said to me. “Even though your name and cell phone number is the last entry in the victim’s phone, you’re not currently a suspect. We have reason to believe your grandmother may have been involved.”
    Yay, for me, but crap. “No way,” I said.
    The detective shifted his weight from side to side