sister again,â I tell him, my hand still on the front of his velvet doublet. âYou gave her your word.â
I can feel the eyes of all the other students on me. Everyoneâs breath is drawn.
For a moment, Cardan just stares at me with stupid, crow-black eyes. Then one corner of his mouth curls. âOh,â he says. âYouâre going to regret doing that.â
I donât think he realizes just how angry I am or how good it feels, for once, to give up on regrets.
T aryn wonât tell me what Prince Cardan said to her. She insists that it had nothing to do with me, that he wasnât actually breaking his promise not to hold her accountable for my bad behavior, that I should forget about her and worry about myself.
âJude, give it up.â She sits in front of the fire in her bedroom, drinking a cup of nettle tea from a clay mug shaped like a snake, its tail coiling to make the handle. She has on her dressing gown, scarlet to match the flames in the grate. Sometimes when I look at her, it seems impossible that her face is also mine. She looks soft, pretty, like a girl in a painting. Like a girl who fits inside her own skin.
âJust tell me what he said,â I press.
âThereâs nothing to tell,â Taryn says. âI know what Iâm doing.â
âAnd whatâs that?â I ask her, my eyebrows lifting, but she only sighs.
Weâve gone three rounds like this already. I keep thinking of the lazy blink of Cardanâs lashes over his coal-bright eyes. He looked gleeful, gloating, as though my fist tightening on his shirt was exactly what he would have wished. As though, if I struck him, it would be because he had made me do it.
âI can annoy you in the hills and also the dales,â I say, poking her in the arm. âI will chase you from crag to crag across all three islands until you tell me
something
.â
âI think we could both bear it better if no one else had to see,â she says, then takes a long pull of her tea.
âWhat?â I am surprised into not knowing what to say in return. âWhat do you mean?â
âI
mean
, I think I could stand being teased and being made to cry if you didnât know about it.â She gives me a steady look, as though evaluating how much truth I can handle. âI canât just pretend my day was fine with you as a witness to what really happened. Sometimes it makes me not like you.â
âThatâs not fair!â I exclaim.
She shrugs. âI know. Thatâs why Iâm telling you. But what Cardan said to me doesnât matter, and I want to pretend it didnât happen, so I need you to pretend along with me. No reminders, no questions, no cautions.â
Stung, I stand and walk to her fireplace mantel, leaning my head against the carved stone. I canât count the number of times sheâs told me that messing with Cardan and his friends is stupid. And yet, given what sheâs saying now, whatever made her cry this afternoon has nothing to do with me. Which means sheâs gotten into some kind of trouble all on her own.
Taryn might have a lot of advice to give; I am not sure sheâs taking all of it.
âSo what
do
you want me to do?â I ask.
âI want you to fix things with him,â she says. âPrince Cardanâs got all the power. Thereâs no winning against him. No matter how brave or clever or even cruel you are, Jude. End this, before you get really hurt.â
I look at her uncomprehendingly. Avoiding Cardanâs wrath now seems impossible. That ship has sailedâand burned up in the harbor. âI canât,â I tell her.
âYou heard what Prince Cardan said by the riverâhe just wants you to
give up
. Itâs a blow to his pride, and it hurts his status, you acting like youâre not afraid of him.â She takes my arm at the wrist, pulling me close. I can smell the sharp scent of herbs on her