won’t be home until late. And I’m on call tomorrow night.”
“Oh.”
Was that disappointment I detected? It sure sounded like it to me.
“I miss you honey.”
“I miss you too. I guess I’m gonna have to sleep with JJ tonight then, huh?”
“Looks that way babe.”
“Okay. I hope JJ is up to the task.”
I laughed. “Well, if he’s not, then you’ll be in the same boat as I am.”
“Oh, how’s that?”
“You’ll just have to resort to manual labor.”
I think she spit out her coffee or something. I heard her sputter and then start coughing.
“Terri, are you all right?”
No answer, but I heard more coughing.
“Terri? Honey are you okay?”
Cough, cough, cough, cough.
“Honey?”
“Justin! Don’t do that to me right when I take a drink of something. I almost choked on my water!”
I just laughed at her. “Um Terri, you have to remember something.”
“What?”
“I can’t see what you’re doing right this minute, so I didn’t know you were taking a drink of something.”
“Well, don’t do it anyway.”
“Okay honey. Well, I gotta go. I’ll call you later tonight.”
“Okay, bye.”
We both ended the call and I grabbed a sandwich from the cafeteria. I ate it on the move because by the time I got back to the OR they’d be ready for me.
********
I left the hospital at nine. I was beat. A shower...that’s all I wanted was a hot shower. The water pounded on my tense neck and shoulders until it started to get cool. Drying off as I walked down the steps, I grabbed whatever I could get my hands on to eat. There would be no cooking tonight. My hunger wouldn’t allow for it. A sandwich, some fruit, a yogurt, chips, a few cookies and a salad later, I was finally satisfied.
Taking the towel from around my waist, I tossed it into the bathroom and brushed and flossed. Then I crawled in between the sheets. My phone was on the nightstand so I hit her number. She answered right away.
“Are you home at last?”
“Yeah. Got here about nine thirty but I was dirty, tense and starved so I had to shower and eat. Now I’m in this huge bed all alone, thinking of you.”
“Hmm. Same here.”
“So how was your day?”
“Well, I’m allergic to waterproof mascara.”
“Imagine that.”
“Yeah. Alice was great. Thanks for referring me. She gave me some cream and told me what to use to take that stuff off with if I ever have to use it again. She said if I would’ve gotten it off that night, I probably would’ve been okay.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, but instead, I ended up with a family of furry critters and swollen lids instead. Oh well. I can’t wear eye make up for two weeks.”
“I’m sorry babe.”
“I’m not. I hate that crap anyway.”
I laughed. Any other girl I knew would’ve called in sick to work. Not Terri. She was happy not to have to wear the stuff. “That’s my girl!”
“So I’m your girl huh?”
Oh fuck! Did I really just say that?
My voice just climbed all the way up my ass and then some. I couldn’t find the damn thing anywhere.
In a tiny voice she said, “It’s okay Justin. You don’t have to answer that. In fact, I didn’t want you to answer it.”
Now didn’t that just make me feel like a shit storm? Where the hell did my goddamn voice go?
“Justin, I think it’s time we both went to sleep. It’s been a really long day for you and for me too.”
Her voice trembled ever so slightly at the end. I heard it and it made me want to bang my head against the wall. She didn’t want me to hear it but I did nevertheless. I wanted to say something, but by now, my stupid ass had been so fucking lame ass quiet, I didn’t know how to start. So I did the next stupidest thing I knew to do. I said, “I think that’s a good idea. Good night Terri.” And I ended the call.
What the hell! How fucking stupid can a person beeee??? I am a goddamn moron.
I knew I should call her right back and if you would’ve asked me why I didn’t, I