Free First Came You (Fate #0.5) by Faith Andrews

he’s trying to help, although we haven’t uttered two words to each other the entire time we’ve shared this school. Why does he care all of a sudden? Because you’re a charity case now, Gabby. Everyone has to be nice to you. The thought makes me angry and my anger drives me to suck in another dreadful drag—one that winds up traveling into my lungs and coming up as poison.
    I choke on the awful taste, wince at the tightness in my chest, and finally hunch over, holding my knees as if I just ran a marathon.
    “Rossi, you gonna live?”
    Stupid choice of words, Miller, you insensitive jerk. When I’m upright, I scowl at him. Then I take another drag—hair of the dog, or something like that—because momentarily feelingpain other than loss, feels liberating. This time it goes down smoother, and I exhale like a pro, with one foot resting up against the brick wall. I’m a regular ol’ Marlboro man now. “You don’t have to be nice to me because my parents died,” I blurt out.
    “That’s not what I’m doing.”
    “Then what are you doing?”
    “I’m sharing a smoke with a cute girl. That a crime?”
    “My boyfriend might think so.” I flick the head of the cigarette, getting a hang of this smoking thing. Mom and Dad would be so proud, you fool. I ignore the guilt and continue perfecting my new hobby.
    Jacob looks around the courtyard and then lifts my left hand, inspecting that too. “I don’t see a ring or a guy. So, again, where’s the crime?”
    I don’t have the strength to fight back so I just shrug. “No crime. And thanks.”
    “For what?” Jacob lights another Newport and joins me against the wall, staring into the great high school courtyard unknown.
    “For not treating me the way everyone else does. Like I’m broken.”
    Jacob takes one more long pull and then drops the butt to the ground, extinguishing it with his shoe. “See ya tomorrow?” he asks over his shoulder as he makes his way back toward the door of the lunchroom.
    “As long as you bring me another one of these.” I flash the remainder of the cigarette at him, before drawing in one last puff.
    “You got it.”
    I never imagined that the highlight of my day would be sharing a smoke with a stranger.

Today when I get home from school, dodging Tommy’s mother as she parks her car in their driveway, I slip the pack of cigarettes I bought for myself in the secret compartment of my backpack. I got tired of bumming off Jacob and the nasty habit became something that soothed me, in a way. I’ve managed to keep it from Gina and Tommy, but the more I hide it, the more I crave it. Another reason I’ve cut my time short with them. Stupid, I know. But lots of my decisions have been stupid lately.
    In the last few months I’ve spent more and more time buddying up with Jacob—the stranger who doesn’t want me to talk about my feelings—and I’ve distanced myself from the two people I love most: my sister and Tommy. I can’t help feeling suffocated by all their concern, and dwelling on my pain only makes matters worse. So I’ve forced it all to the back of my mind, hoping one day I’ll wake up and it will just disappear.
    Gathering the mail after locking the door behind me, the phone rings within seconds of crossing the threshold. I contemplate ignoring it, but I never do that anymore. Not since the phone call. I’m always worried I’ll miss a chance to save someone by not answering.
    “Hello,” I answer, kicking off my shoes.
    “Hey, babe. Just checking in.”
    I check the clock—right on time. “I’m home,” I sing, rolling my eyes. Tommy keeps tabs on me like I’m his child these days. That’s Gina’s new job. Can’t he just be my boyfriend again? I’m not in the market for another father anytime soon.
    “How was your day?” he asks, the sound of computer keys ticking in the background.
    “Good. Same as yesterday. You know the deal.”
    “Yup. Okay, well, I just wanted to make sure you were okay and to remind