fried rice and more beer.
âI suppose Iâm a case in point,â she said. âI can plan my life. Iâve had real choices. Of course it doesnât always go to plan ⦠worst of all when my horse died. But Iâve put my career on hold, let my house in Islington and returned my company car. I was working sixteen hours a day, half of it over the Atlantic going to meetings in New York. It was grim but now Iâm flying for free with my Air Miles.â
âAlright for some,â said Samantha sourly.
âYes, but thereâs always a price. Corporate law was exciting and Iâm glad I did it, but Iâm glad Iâm not doing it any more. No more grovelling to my clients and worrying about professional negligence claims. Escaping my mobileâs amazing.â
âSo weâre all running away from something then. Is that what weâre doing?â asked Emma, drawing on her cigarette. âMe and Ben couldnât make any decisions after uni, so we went travelling to avoid growing up.â
âSpeak for yourself,â said Ben indignantly. âI went travelling to learn about other parts of the world.â
âCrap, you didnât. You just werenât mature enough to face up to work ⦠so why not sponge off your parents and bugger off abroad. What parts did you learn about in the go-go bars then? Tell me that!â
Ben was saved from having to answer Emmaâs broadside by the food arriving at the table, but when everyone was dipping in, she pressed her point.
âSo maybe weâre all in transition or putting off difficult decisions ⦠like me and Ben not getting jobs, Clarissa leaving hers, and Chuck and Maca forever drifting around the place. But what about you?â she asked the two girls.
âWell, I donât see it as running away,â said Samantha. Me and Nadia gave up our jobs to come out here ⦠Thailand first, then Malaysia and Singapore. But itâs all a bit different for us ⦠life I mean.â
âWhy is it? In what way?â
âWell, thereâs no horses in Hackney ⦠silver spoon up me arse more like. None of this university stuff ⦠just got a few GCSEs and Iâm lucky to be a secretary. Iâve struggled up from the bottom and now Iâm a supervisor ⦠well, I was until I gave in my notice. It was partly because I broke up with my boyfriend. Then me and Nadia came out here together.â
âAnd now you hate Thailand?â
âWell, not hate it exactly, but itâs not what I expected. Weâve worked for our holiday and now we want to relax and not be fighting with the Thais.â
âBut why do you see everyone as hostile?â asked Emma.
âMaybe because where I come from, lifeâs always a struggle and you have to battle for every little thing. And thereâs so many decisions to make, so many choices. I donât just mean work, I mean life in general ⦠what you want to be, who you settle down with and stuff. Itâs like Iâm always at a turning point and about to get it wrong.â Samantha clung to her empty beer bottle.
âHow nice,â said Clarissa. âGetting older means I donât have so many options left.â
âSounds great,â said Samantha. âFewer nooses to stick your neck into. I envy the Thai workers here on the beach with no prospects, just blue sea and sky.â
âYou canât really believe that,â said Ben. âEveryone wants opportunities and not to be stuck in a hole.â
Samantha was sitting stiffly upright, but the alcohol had loosened her tongue.
âIâm sure getting older can be tough,â she said, âbut I always think of my Auntie Ada. Sheâs lived in Hackney all her life ⦠itâs the whole world to her. She was a cleaner, married to my Uncle Ken. He snuffed it a few years back and now sheâs got the ideal life, safe and settled. Sheâs