said, looking shyly around the group.
âHowlongyoubin in Thailand, Stig?â said Maca, asking the universal opener.
âPattaya one month. Always good, Pattaya.â
âPattaya good for the ladies, yah?â
âYah, I like,â said Stig. âItâs the best.â
âBut I just adore Koh Samet,â enthused Clarissa. âThese are the good old days!â
âGolly yes, by Jove!â said Maca mercilessly. âAnd Sam, howlongyoubin here?â
âThree weeks and I detest it,â said Samantha. It was quite a conversation stopper.
âWhy?â asked Maca in surprise. âWhateverâs wrong with Thailand?â
âWell, thereâs nothingâd make me want to come back. Land of Smiles, my arse.â
Ben eyed Samantha across the table. She was in her early twenties with a golden tan, dark, close-cropped hair, large vulnerable eyes and a full body, tightly packaged in a skimpy top. Not bad at all, he thought, though Nadiaâs a bit butch.
âHad some nasty experiences then?â he asked Samantha.
âNot really, but the Thais cart us around like animals without telling us whatâs going on. Theyâre inefficient, canât read a clock and never give a straight answer to a simple question. Smiley when they want to be, but at other times totally offhand.â
âWell, I like them as they are,â said Maca. âWeâre their livelihood but they keep their dignity.â
âThey donât have to be so rude!â said Samantha.
âMaybe we get the response we deserve,â he said provocatively. âAnd we donât wantâem ending up like these Americans with their plastic McDonalds politeness.â
Ben could see the fire in Samanthaâs eyes as she responded.
âWell, Iâm talking about the basics. They just donât react normally!â
âBut it depends whatâs normal ⦠your normal behaviour isnât the same as theirs. Maybe itâs a language problem ⦠theyâre embarrassed because they canât understand, so they just giggle. Theyâll clam up if thereâs any tension or if they sense you donât like their country. Probing questions make them uncomfortable too ⦠theyâll just tell you what they think you want to hear.â
âBut youâve got to be able to ask for things!â said Samantha angrily.
âYes, but you gotta keepâem smiling. Harmonyâs number one.â
âEven when Iâm paying them!â Samantha gripped the arms of her chair and glared at Maca.
âMaybe thatâs it ⦠you standing on your rights. You mustnât demand or complain ⦠and donât ever expect an apology from a Thai. They may seem humble, but makeâem lose face and youâll just get passive resistance. It can be frustrating but itâs better than confrontation, American-style.â
âSure man ⦠shut up about Americans and pass on this spliff,â said Chuck. A soggy hand-rolled cigarette went on around the table, only Clarissa passing it on unpuffed.
âAnyway, I like lazing around and being harmonious,â said Maca. âThatâs why Iâm here ⦠for the Thais and their gentleness.â
Intense and unsmiling and armed with a fresh bottle of beer, Samantha now tried another justification for not liking Thailand.
âAnd what about sex for sale,â she said. âIn Bangkok itâs totally open. Nadia and me went to the nightmarket in Patpong Road. The touts outside the bars were disgusting, trying to drag us into them sex shows. Showed us these cards ⦠âpussy eat banana, boy fuck girlâ. Stuff like that.â
âSam, itâs the same the whole world over,â said Stig lolling back in his chair, his five oâclock shadow creased into a permanent smile.
âYeah, but Bangkokâs swarming withâem. And theyâre all on the make