Free Learning to Love Again by Kelli Heneghan, Nathan Squiers

today.  She called your dad at lunch time and he took the afternoon off, told me he had personal business.”  Now it was Uncle Steve’s turn to clear his throat.  “I don’t know how else to say this, honey, but your dad followed your mom and it looks like they argued.  The police will do more tests but they think he shot your mom and then shot himself.”
    Her vision had narrowed down to just the sheriff in front of her.  She could see everyone’s lips moving but the words weren’t making sense. A roaring sound filled her ears and her vision blurred before she blacked out.  She remembered bits and pieces of the next few days as she moved through them in a haze of grief and shock.  Aunt Helen and Uncle Steve had bundled her up and moved her over to their house and had taken care of all the details for the funerals and burials.  She hadn’t returned to her parents’ house since that day.  Uncle Steve had gotten a couple of his ranch hands to pack everything up for her.  They'd sold off anything of value that she didn't want.  The rest was boxed up and still in the attic here at the ranch, waiting for her to go through it all.

    She was thrust back into the present when her cousin sat down next to her on the swing.  Letting out a screech of surprise, she turned her head to glare at her cousin.  She’d been so wrapped up in thoughts of the past, she hadn’t realized he’d joined her.
    “What are you doing, sneaking around in the dark like that?”
    “It’s my house; I can sneak if I want to.  Besides, it isn’t dark yet.”  Mitch settled onto the swing with her.  “What are you doing out here by yourself, are you okay?  Where’d Jason go?”
    “You can stop asking me that all the time.  I’m fine.”  She pulled her legs up and wrapped her arms around her knees.  “Jason decided to head on home.  I think he was afraid of what you’d say if he came back in with me.”  She paused and turned her head to meet her cousin’s knowing look.  “He wants us to start over and to try again.”
    Mitch studied her for a few brief seconds before speaking.  “Nicole, I stayed out of it the first time around, but this time I am going to give you my opinion, whether you want it or not,” he paused for a second, looking out at his ranch before turning back to her.  “Before you start anything, you need to figure out what you want and where Jason fits into that equation.  I know you want to be happy and not to have any regrets when you look back at your life.  But, honey, that’s part of life.  We all have regrets.  I know what your mother used to say to you about love and marriage, and how it was all a trap.  But for some reason your mother was not a happy person and she refused to try to change that.  Don’t let her continue to dictate your life from the grave,” Mitch stretched his arm out across the back of the swing, his foot starting the motion of the swing up again.  “If that’s here and with Jason, then great.  If it’s not, then tell me what you need my help with, and you know you’ve got it.”
    “Mitch, right now, the only regret I have is staying away from this town for so long and listening to that voice in my head telling me to never trust someone who says they love you,” she answered him.  “You know what a miserable childhood I had.  I realize now that I have been running from it.  Being back here, being able to remember some of the good things from my childhood instead of just mom’s anger and hatred, well, I’m beginning to let go of the past. I just wish...”  She swallowed hard around a sudden lump in her throat.  “I just wish Daddy were still here to answer some of my questions, you know?  Like how did he ever fall in love with someone like her, or what changed her?  And why did he do what he did?”
    Mitch curled his fingers around her shoulder and she laid her head on his shoulder and they sat there for a few silent minutes, the soft creaking