until he saw for himself what our little friend was capable of.
‘I want to swim,’ I announced, wading forward. I wanted to be away from him, from those eyes of his.
Thorne’s hand jerked out to grab me. ‘Careful.’ He didn’t touch my skin. I was acutely aware of it. Instead his hand stayed safely in the folds of my shirt.
I turned back to him, surprised. ‘Why?’
‘Because there are people in that house waiting for you to come home.’
‘You think the touch of the ocean would keep me from them? I grew up here, Thorne. I live in this water.’
‘So you don’t need to be careful?’ he asked quietly. ‘ Ever? ’
‘Why?’ I pressed again.
He didn’t respond this time.
‘You’re so careful you’ll grow old and brittle,’ I warned.
‘Maybe so,’ he answered, sounding old and brittle, and I felt instantly bad. I wanted to know what his life was like, what he’d seen, what he’d lived through. He was too old for his body.
He said, ‘But you are careless with life.’
I swallowed, panicked. My eyes had gone green, edged with silver. His stayed the same. As they always would.
I knew what colour all the pieces of us were meant to be, but I’d never known what colour the bits in between were. I’d never known how red they’d be. Never known what the touch of the air between two bodies felt like, never guessed it would be sharp and soft and brutal, or pale, pale blue.
We stared at each other, and the moment stopped. Like the greatest fool in the world, my eyes slid to match his hue.
And that was that. There would be no more quiet moments with this man. No more words spoken softly at night over the crashing of waves. There would be no more looks like these, no more eyes changing to blue or black. I would make certain of it.
I took off my clothes, all of them, ignoring his intake of breath, and then I plunged into the sea. And I did it just to annoy him.
When I surfaced he’d disappeared, the darkness swallowing him up, and I was alone again under a sparkling black sky.
Thorne
I’d never considered colour before, never understood that it could say so much, explain so much. But here with the Kayans, who understood colour to mean emotion, I was painfully aware of how inadequate my own imaginings of feeling had been.
She was as wild as my first impression of her had been; her eyes shifted like leaves in a storm.
But there were stronger things in the world than any colour an eye could shift to. Things like my beast.
He could never be allowed to have her. So I’d walk away as many times as I had to.
Chapter 5
Finn
‘You are not bringing three packs.’
I looked at my brother, then back at the three packs I’d stuffed full to the brim. ‘Why not?’
‘Explain to me how you’re going to carry them.’
‘Well …’ I smiled sweetly at him.
‘No way. I’m not helping you indulge your clothing fetish. You couldn’t possibly need this much stuff.’
‘We’re going to Sancia! It’s the fashion capital! How am I supposed to know what to wear before we get there? And who knows how long we’ll be away.’
He shook his head with disbelief. ‘You’re bringing one pack, light enough to travel with.’
‘But –’
‘One .’
‘You, dreaded brother, are the bane of my life,’ I grumbled, moodily unpacking. In response he kissed me noisily on the cheek and I shoved him away.
When we were ready (carrying one measly pack each) we stopped outside Da’s bedroom. He was tired today, too tired to get up. Jonah sat on the bed and spoke to him, but I waited by the door, something hardening inside my chest with suffocating severity.
They both looked over at me, but I couldn’t go in. I couldn’t.
I looked at Da across the room. ‘My girl,’ he said to me, then he touched his fingers to his lips and sent me the kiss. I did the same, touching my lips. My teeth were clenched so hard I thought they might shatter. Then Iwalked out of the house I’d lived my entire life in, and