Free Forever With You (Silver State Series) by Renae Kelleigh Page A

yourself, Kyle seems like he’d be willing, right?  And I’ve seen the man – he’s gorgeous.  I mean, you could do a lot worse, you know?  As long as you both have clear expectations going in, and you understand he can have sex with other girls, just like you’re welcome to have sex with other guys, then it actually seems like a pretty perfect arrangement.”
    A lot about what she’s saying rings true, even if it goes against everything I’ve been brought up to believe.  I never intended on saving myself for marriage, but I never saw myself as someone who could be content with a random hookup either.  I bob my head along as she speaks, wanting more than anything to go along with what she’s saying.  Once she finishes, she sits back with her hands clasped over her stomach, awaiting my response.
    I draw a strand of my hair through my lips, an old habit that’s hard to break.  “There’s just one other complicating factor,” I say.  She lifts an eyebrow, looking as if nothing could surprise her.  I clear my throat and rub my chin, unsure if there’s some graceful way of phrasing my next statement.  Deciding that, nope, there doesn’t seem to be, I just take a deep breath and blurt out, “I’m a virgin.”
    Harumi’s standard poker face doesn’t change one bit.  After a moment she steeples her fingers beneath her chin and says, “And why is that a complicating factor?”
    Her question catches me off-guard.  “I… I don’t know.  It just seems like a big deal…”
    She sighs.  “Tawny.  It’s only a big deal if you let it be a big deal.  It’s sex, not neurosurgery.  There has to be a first time for everything.  If it wasn’t for our language assigning a special label to those who haven’t had sex, I guarantee it would seem much less significant.”
    I eye her apprehensively.  She seems to pick up on the fact I’m not completely sold on the idea.  “Look.  Some people’s virginity is very sacred to them.  I don’t think that’s a bad thing.  I’m not trying to sway you one way or the other – I’m just saying you have to think about whether it’s a big deal to you .  Not to your parents, not to your friends, and not to Kyle.  You’re the one who matters here.” 
    I have to admit she makes a lot of sense.  And truly there’s some small part of me jumping up and down at the prospect of ignoring all the conventions modeled for me during my upbringing.  Plus, sex with Kyle would be nothing if not exciting.
    I watch Harumi as the seed she’s planted takes root in my mind.  After a moment a smile spreads slowly over her face, and she speaks again.  “Now – while it’s true this is one hundred percent your decision, if you want my unsolicited opinion, it seems to me that Kyle would be the perfect person to instruct you in the ways of physical love.”  She wiggles her eyebrows at me playfully – Harumi has very expressive eyebrows, I’ve noticed.
    I can’t help it – I burst out giggling.  I have to bury my face in a pillow to muffle my laughter.  Imagine – Kyle Freeman as my very own sex tutor.
     
    4:00 PM
    T wo hours later, Harumi is sitting beside me with her computer open on her lap, and I’m in hysterics – my abs are getting sore from laughing so hard.  Then the door opens and Beatrix walks in.
    With a boy .
    So long, giggles.
    “What’s so funny?” she asks, blinking her confusion as she moves into the room.  Her friend, a not-unattractive Hispanic guy, glances between us as if he’s waiting to be let in on the joke.
    “Ever heard of Nips Ahoy, B?” asks Harumi.
    “Is that a sex position?” says Beatrix.  Her eyes narrow with suspicion.
    “So you’ve heard of it,” says Harumi.
    Beatrix shrugs.  “Not exactly.  It just sounds like something straight out of Cosmo.  What is it?”
    Harumi reads the description while Beatrix drops her bag and joins us on my bed.  I watch, mortified, as her friend drops into a desk chair.  For